Hindering Love
by GermanPikachu
Summary: Sequel to Stubborn Love. New challenges find their way as a new figure decided to pop in and wreck havoc in Star Fleet. Not only Abs have to worry about Khan but she has to worry about Carol Marcus.
1. Chapter 1

The year is 2259.55. It has been a few years since I first boarded the Enterprise under the command of now Admiral Christopher Pike then succeeded by James Kirk. I should of jumped ship ages ago considering who the captain was. I choose not to as James and I have reconnected our childhood years and created new years of actually being together. Who would of thought that I was going to end up with the player genius of our little hometown in Iowa? No one. When we showed up for a little get together that our old high school was doing, well some jaws dropped. It brought me into giggles when the slut mcslutterns saw James and I give a kiss here and there, well let's just say it brighten my night. Johanna have grown quite well, her growth charts are amazing and her health is in order. Of course with Bones and me checking on her everytime she even got the sniffles. Mattie, yes Mattie I have nicknamed my twin brother, saw her a few times. He made sure Johanna calls him Uncle Matt. I have been dwelling on that topic for a while and James and I have decided to reveal to her when she is old enough that Matthew is her real father and I'm her aunt.

"Miss McCoy, I have a question for you," a woman voice piped up from my left.

I looked up from my glasses seeing a rather short thin woman standing in her academy uniform. She adjusted her textbooks in her arms as she all the sudden felt nervous. I raised an eyebrow, "What is the question...uhmmm?"

She piped up, "Victoria. I'm Victoria in the Medical 101 class that you guested in a couple days ago."

I gave her a slight nod, "Alright Victoria, what's the question?"

Victoria asked, "How are you able to keep up with every ship personal that you are on board with? I cannot seem to even keep track with my classmates."

I placed my pen down from writing a report and sighed. My hand shot up to my neck rubbing the tender muscles, "Well... actually I have no idea... I know that I keep up with the files but I do not remember every person on board. Only close friends that I have gained that I know and really keep track with. Other than that, the computer would remind me when the next personal's check up is and I would com for them. That does not mean you can slack off. Do not slack off, that is not what I am implying here. Does that answer your question?"

Victoria nodded, "Yes now I have another question ab-."

I held up a hand, "If the question is about how I am able to maintain the infamous Captain James Kirk, then I am not answering. Sorry Ensign. Now if that is all your questions, I will take my leave for the day."

She blushed slightly giving a nod. I stood up gathering my belongings. I gave her a light nod before exiting the temporary office Star Fleet have offered me while I give guest lectures. Bones weaseled his way out of this as he has to make sure James do not do anything stupid on their mission on Nibiru the Class M Planet. I still have a feeling that he is still going to do something stupid. I fixed my grey uniform jacket and headed out of the office. Jim and I have decided that it was best to start living together so we got a pad near HQ. He should be grounded soon. James wouldn't tell me when though which irritates me because I do not like surprises. Well good surprises are sometimes good.

* * *

Johanna was sitting in a chair that was placed beside Chekov. She loves the little russian as he would tell her stories in Russian. Surprisingly she would understand it considering Chekov is the only one who would speak russian to her. Johanna looked at the curly haired russian with her big blue eyes, "Pavel... when do you think daddy would be back on board?"

Chekov gave a little chuckle, "I am not zure little flower. Zoon hopefully."

Johanna kicked her feet back and forth on the chair, "Will you tell me a story?"

Chekov smiled sadly, "I am zorry Johanna but I can't do zat right now. I must make zure that the zhip iz in good condition."

Johanna pouted her lips. The door swished open. Chekov glanced back, "Keptin on the bridge!"

She noticed all of the members on the bridge went to attention. Her blue eyes glanced over to her soaked father. He looks to be in a serious mood so she wouldn't dare to bother him. James looked over at Uhura, "Lt. Do we have an open channel to Mr. Spock?"

Uhura looked to be stressed, "The heats frying his coms but we still have contact."

Johanna noticed Uhura's lip quivered. Johanna bit her own lip in worry. What is going on? Is Spock in the volcano still? She hopes not as her gave her great insight. Johanna's eyes manuevered to her father as he pressed a button. He shouted to the com, "Spock!"

" I have activated the device captain. It should complete the reaction and rendered the hearth, " Spock's voice filled the bridge. He sounded slightly raspy. Johanna stared at the com button. She didn't even noticed her father making commands and yelling at Spock to forget the code. She focused on Spock's voice as it sounded like he was getting the moisture and air sucked out of him by the volcanic waves of heat. She broke eye contact with the button to stare at the screen, "Spock... Spock please come back on board."

Spock didn't say anything for a moment. Everyone's eyes turned to Johanna. James was about to speak till Spock interrupted, "I am sorry Johanna but there is nothing we can do."

Johanna could feel her throat constricting. Johanna treats the crew as family so knowing just her uncle Spock is going to die is killing her. James stared at Johanna as her eyes start to well up. Spock continued talking till his com decided to poop out. James glanced up at Uhura, "Try to get him back online."

Uhura instantly went to her post to try to get him back online. James walked towards Johanna. He placed a stray collection of hair behind her ear, "Jo, we are going to get him back don't you worry. You'll have your chess partner back."

Johanna sniffled giving James a weary nod. James stood back up to look back at the screen. He spoke softly to Bones, "If Spock was here and I was there, what would he do?"

Bones answered truthfully, "He would let you die."

Johanna heard that sentence and it broke her heart. It lead her to break out into a sob. James and Bones eyes flickered to the 4 year old. Johanna sniffled some more wiping her eyes. The Enterprise started to rise from the depths of the water. Sulu started to fly the Enterprise close enough to beam Spock back up. Johanna heard the pads of Bones and James' feet running to the transporter room. She stood up. Chekov was about to grab her hand to stop her but he was too late she was already following the two men before her. Bones and James stopped infront of Spock. Uhura notified the captain and Spock the device went off. Johanna made it to the transporter room when James spoke, "You hear that Spock? You saved the world?"

Spock decided to argue with James, "Captain they have saw us."

James replied, "They saw us? Big deal."

Johanna walked slowly to her father's pant leg. Her hands gripped onto his wet suit peering up at Spock. His brown eyes glanced down to the peering Johanna. He breathed out, "Johanna I am sorry."

Johanna moved away from her dad's pant leg clenching her fists, "You're a big meanie Mr. Spock! I wouldn't of have my best friend to play chess with anymore if you would of died!"

Spock could see the tears fall from her eyes. He took a step forward till James' hand was put in front of him. James could feel the heat radiate off the suit, "You're still blazing hot Spock. Go change."

Spock nodded leaving us three in the transporter room. James bent down to Johanna's height. The pads of his thumbs wipe across her cheeks, "After he gets change you can give him a hug, how about that?"

Johanna nodded, "Okay daddy."

James smiled picking the child up, "Which reminds me we need to give a certain woman a ring a ding."

Bones looked over at James, "She is going to have your head once she finds out what happens here."

Johanna nuzzled her face into James' wet neck. James winked at Bones, "She is not going to find out."

Johanna moved away from James' neck to look at him, "Mommy is going to get you Daddy for not telling her."

James stared into her blue eyes, "It's our little secret."

Bones sighed, "That's not something you teach to a kid, Jim."


	2. Chapter 2

I rubbed my neck throwing the keys in a key bowl. Bones insisted we get a key bowl so James OR I lose our keys. I find it hopeless. I'll forget about the bowl and then you know lose them. I raised an eyebrow at a turned on light that I know for sure that it was off when I left this morning. I could feel my heart slowly start to speed up. I crinkled my nose. I don't have my phaser. Most of the time when we are on Earth we do not need a phaser as well it's our home planet. I slowly walked more into my home. Someone is here, no doubt about it. I peered over the wall into the kitchen. No one. My eyes flickered around the room to see if any one is hiding in the shadows that are away from the illuminated area. I crept closer to the area where the light is turned on, "H-Hello? Anyone here? If there is show your self."

My hand went over a drawer in the hallway. I slowly pulled it open taking my phaser into my hand. I could hear footsteps pad across the floor. I held up my phaser inorder to protect myself. I switched it to stun as the steps came closer. My finger was about to pull the trigger till a shirtless James came into my view. I sighed loudly, "Dammit James! You could of you know commed me or something saying you were home. Instead I had you at gun point."

James's lips went into a smirk, "Oh but the surprise Abs."

I placed the phaser onto the bar counter. James lifted his hand to my head and flicked my hat off, "You forgot you had your hat on."

My reflexes instantly went to catch the hat which ended up to be successful. I dusted off the air particles ontop of the hat, "I was more focused if I had an intruder in here."

My eyes studied him then around him, "Where's Johanna?"

James' hands went to my waist bringing me closer to him, "Spock nearly scared her so he is paying her back by babysitting her for us."

I raised an eyebrow in question, "What did he scare her with?"

James shrugged, "I don't know. She was crying when I saw her. I made sure Spock treated her for dinner and babysit her for the rest of the night cause I know a little lady that happen to be waiting for me to come home."

I poked his nose with a finger, "You have been gone for a few weeks."

James' lips touched my neck, "Too long."

I chuckled rolling my eyes, "How was the mission?"

I felt his hands pull me tighter against him. He responded inbetween neck kisses, "It went well. Saved the species."

I have a feeling he is leaving something out. I will let it slide for now till something pops up. A hand of his started to work unbuttoning my grey uniform jacket. My hands went through his hair and rested on his neck, "Jim... we shouldn't."

James smirked against my skin, "You weren't shy a few weeks ago."

I rested a hand onto his bare chest, "That was because you were leaving and I was stuck here on Earth since Bones decided to decline the guest speaker offer so they went to me and Star Fleet Academy insisted till no end so I had no choice to accept."

James pulled away. A hand went to my cheek while the pad of his thumb rub against my cheekbone, "It shouldn't matter though. We love each other and I love making you feel pleasurable. I want to make sure I keep to my duties in making you happy physically and mentally."

He winked at me. I chuckled giving him a kiss on his nose, "You do make me happy both ways but I had a long day today... I am just not in the mood for it. Now if you were to tell me hey you me later tonight then yeah I'd be more pumped up for it. I just had a long day with students who keep asking questions about you and of course the medical field."

James unbuttoned the last button of my jacket. Both his hands gripped onto my jacket shaking it off of me, "Questions about me?"

I frowned undoing my bun, "Yes about you egomaniac. They wanted to know what you were like, how did you end up with me, all of those stupid questions."

I could feel his chest rumble in my personal space. He's laughing. I crossed my arms, "Not funny James. They were all girls except a couple guys who fancied you as well."

James stopped laughing. I smirked unbuttoning my shirt, "That's what you get and it's true though some guys did ask about you as well."

My fingers gripped at my white shirt pulling it up from my skirt to continue unbuttoning it. The sound of my jacket hitting a chair ringed through my ears. James' presence towered behind me, "Well so they should know, you are the only one that I want and as of now need. I need to feel you again against my body Abbbbbbs."

I shook my head, "Long day, no."

His arms went underneath me and he picked me up like a groom would to a bride. I yelped instantly wrapping my arms around his neck, "James!"

His chest vibrated once again. I playfully smacked his shoulder, "Not funny!"

His lips captured mine. I melted into his kiss. To pull away, James threw me ontop of the bed. Thank god it was comfortable or that would of hurt my back. He knows I cannot resist him any longer. It's hard to say no sometimes when it comes to this. He knows which buttons to push. I always want it yes, but I am tired today. James climbed ontop of me. His eyes traveled over my bra exposed chest. I couldn't help but wander my eyes as well. That chiseled chest, that's all mine. I looked up to meet with his baby blues. He spoke up, "We don't have to do anything Abs but can we at least play around so we can at least have skin to skin contact?"

I couldn't break away from his eye contact. I gave a slow nod, "Okay."

He smiled showing his pearly whites making me smile in response. He leaned down doing a half way push up. His lips gently came in contact with mine.

* * *

I had to leave early to give a guest speaking to an early class. Before I left this morning, my clothes was everywhere. I had to play where oh where are my things. Luckily I have found everything. I puffed a breath of air to my bangs as I walked towards the classroom where 30 students would be sitting waiting for me with their professor. During last night of our little fun, a transmission came to James' communicator. I figured it was Spock or Bones so I didn't pay much attention to it. The sun shined brightly over San Fran. I don't mind the sun but I do prefer space as of now. I know James is back for a bit of grounding but I just want to go back into space. I opened a few doors to lead me to the classroom. The professor was waiting outside for me. His arms were crossed. He seemed to be balding making him look much older than he already is. His brown eyes perked up at the sound of my boots, "Ah Lt. Commander McCoy, it is good to see you."

I gave him a soft smile, "As it is to you Professor...?"

His lips curved upward making his eye wrinkles more out there in the world, "Balton. Professor Balton. I have a message for you to go to the Headquarters. Admiral Pike would like to speak with you."

I raised an eyebrow, "Oh... okay... I will postpone this or...?"

The older man's smile never left his face, "You do not have to worry about it. I can get that fellow Lt. Commander Leonard McCoy to fill in for you."

A big smile broke onto my face, "Oh thank you Professor Balton. I shall take my leave now. Farewell."

The professor nodded turning back to his classroom. I started on my way to HQ. I wonder what Pike needs from me... I did nothing wrong right? All I have been doing is guest speaking at classes. I am sure he had to know about that right?

* * *

James have changed into his grey uniform. He knew that Abs have left earlier. He was starting to wake up when she was changing into her uniform. James enjoyed the show till she had to leave to he have no idea where. Pike wants to see him and Spock urgently this morning. Spock met up with James at the parking lot of HQ. James held onto his hat in his hand, "Spock I am telling you this is why he called. I can feel it."

Spock answer," Your feeling aside, we are highly unlikely to be selected for the new program."

James looked over at Spock in disbelief that he didn't believe in the two of them, "Wha-Why else would Pike want to see us? Forget about seniority, they gave us the newst ship in the fleet. Who else they gonna send?"

Spock was in process of speaking till James interrupted him by walking backwards shaking his fists excitedly, "Five year mission Spock! That's deep space. Uncharted territory."

Spock inwardly sigh. His brown eyes captured a figure into his vision, "Abigail?"

James heard Spock say her name and turned to his attention to Spock's gaze. James tilted his head slightly, "I wonder what she is doing here."

* * *

A familiar voice echoed through the courtyard, "Hey Abs!"

I turned around seeing the vulcan human duo. I raised an eyebrow. The duo came to a halt once they were closer. James sprung a question, "Whatcha doing here Abs?"

I shrugged, "Pike wants to see me."

Spock raised his vulcan eyebrow," Odd I find that strange as Pike requests our presence as well."

I turned to James looking him in the eye, "What did you do James?"

James laughed nervously, "What are you talking about Abs? I did nothing wrong. They might of picked us for the new program."

I frowned a bit, "I highly doubt it."

Spock looked between the two of us, "I suggest we head to Pike right now."

My eyes flickered to him nodding. Spock opened the door letting me go in first the James after we took our hats off. I turned my head towards Spock, "Where is Johanna?"

Spock answered, "She is with my father who happen to be visiting."

A smile broke onto my face, "She is going to drive that vulcan up against the wall."

Spock raised his eyebrow at my statement. James' hand went to the little of my back ushering me to Pike's office. We stood infront of the wooden door. I looked at the two then the door. I raised my hand up knocking on the door. A faint come in was to be heard. I opened the door seeing Pike leaning back on his chair with his cane leaning against the desk. I peeked my head in, "You called for me and the other two sir?"

Pike sat up leaning on his arms, "Yes please come in."

The three of us filed in. James was on the far right then Spock then me. Pike's right of course. Pike studied the three of us. He started speaking, " Uneventful."

James questioned, "Admiral?"

Pike continued," That is the way you described about the survey in your captain's log."

James answered, "Yes sir, I didn't want to waste your time-."

Pike interrupted, "Please tell me about this volcano. Data says it's to erupt and wipe out the planet."

What did you do... My eyes glanced over to the duo.

James replied, "Yes sir."

Pike looked at the duo, "Something tells me it won't."

James tried to come up with an excuse, "Uh... Well sir our data may be off."

Pike started to get riled up, "Well maybe because Spock activated a cold fusion device inside the volcano, right after a civilization who barely invented the wheel happen to see a star ship rising out of their ocean. Is pretty much how you described it is it not, Mr. Spock?"

I looked up at James then at Spock. Spock answered, "Admiral-."

James interrupted him, "You filed a report? Why didn't you tell me?"

Spock started, " I have incorrectly assume you would be truthful in your captain's log."

James responded back, "I would of been if I didn't have to save your life."

My eyes narrowed at the two. So that's why Johanna was scared by Spock. He nearly died. Those two are like attached to each other other than her being attached to Bones and James.

Spock raised his voice slightly, "In fact which I am immeasurable, very reason why I felt it was necessary to take responsibility."

I heard James gave a breathing laugh repeating the word responsibility.

JAmes spoke, "If you weren't so noble pointy if you weren't throwing me under the bus."

Spock furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, "pointy? is that a derogatory reference?"

Pike stood up, "Gentlemen. Star fleet mandates to explore not to interfere."

Spock spoke, "Have the mission not going according to plan, Admiral. The indigenous species would have never been aware of our interference."

" A technicality, "the admiral replied.

" I am vulcan, we embrace technicality, " Spock countered.

Pike cane walked towards Spock, "You giving me an attitude Spock?"

Spock answered truthfully, " I am expressing multiple attitudes. To which are you refering?"

Pike let out a quiet word, "Out. You are dismissed Commander."

Spoke looked over at James then over to me. Spock left the room.

Pike turned his attention to me, "Where were you when the Enterprise was on the survey mission to Nibiru?"

I piped up, "I was on Earth sir doing guest speakings. I do not see how that is relevance to their situation."

Pike let out a breath, "Well I have an offer from the Academy from Marcus to give you a teaching job seeing all of the students loved you when you guest spoke."

James was about to speak till I placed a hand on his sleeved arm. I looked over at pike, "What is the reason for the sudden offer? Some kids loved me but the rest did not care at all."

Pike walked closer to me, "Marcus have ordered me to give you the offer as he says families cannot be on the same ship as each other."

I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion, "Excuse me? I do not have any family on the Enterprise. True given that everyone is family to me but I do not have living blood relatives on the Enterprise."

Pike let out a sigh resting a hand on my shoulder, "McCoy have adopted you as a daughter so that makes you his family. I am sorry Abigail."

I cannot leave everyone. I love everyone. I love Bones. Spock. Nyota. Scotty. Pavel. I love James, my captain. I slid my hand down to James' hand and gripped onto James' hand, "I...Are there any other choices?"

Pike shook his head, "No there is not unless you do not take the offer then you are transferred to another star ship."

James clenched his hand around mine. He is already in deep enough trouble as it is, I will not let him speak out. I glanced over to James then at Pike, "I... I have to think of my decision Admiral."

Pike nodded his head, "You are dismissed Lt. Commander."

I gave a nod. I left the room leaving James to his punishment of some sort but not without squeezing his hand for reassurance. I glanced behind me seeing the two. Pike's eyes watched me till I closed the door behind me. I could feel tears well up. I heard footsteps heading towards me. The vulcan voice ringed thorugh my ears, "Are you alright Abigail?"

I looked up at Spock in my blurred vision. I pounced on the man to get a hug out of him. The tears start to fall from my eyes as I grip tightly at the hug from the vulcan. I just stayed there till James came out of the room. This is going to be a tough decision and no matter what I will lose either way.


	3. Chapter 3

I noticed that I am missing some words to their talking from the movie. It's really hard to keep up and I even re-winded a ton of times. So please bare with me. I am probably even freaking my dvd out but hey I don't want to freak it out too much.

* * *

I feel hollow. I don't want to leave everyone. I really don't want to leave James. It was hard to go through the guest speakings but I knew that I would see him as it was a survey mission. Now I wouldn't be able to know when I or him will be back in one piece. I untangled my hair from my bun. I already threw my hat on our bed. James was getting Johanna from Sarek. When James came out of Pike's office, I was still in Spock's arms. Spock looked slightly uncomfortable but I didn't care at that moment. James had to peel me off of Spock and gave soothing rubs on my back. I noticed something is off with James when we were heading back to the pad. My eyes glanced over towards the man sitting next to me in his driver seat many times as we drove home. The key to our home went inside the lock to unlock it. A happy voice filled the rooms, "Daddy, I had much fun with Mr. Sarek! He told me all about the vulcan way."

In the corner of my eye, James petted Johanna's head, "Jo please do not be a vulcan."

Johanna's body came into my view, "I want to do what I want to daddy."

I looked up from my hands to see the 4 year old walking towards me with her arms crossed pouting. A little smile danced on my lips, "Jo, he can't handle another vulcan. They can be unbearable to him sometimes."

Johanna's blue eyes turned towards me and smiled. She ran up to me with her arms wide open, "Mommy!"

I hugged the child breathing in her scent. James undid his jacket and hung it on a hanger placing it into the hallway closet. My eyes rose to meet his. I pulled away from Johanna, "How about this... you go get wash up for dinner and you can help me cook, how does that sound?"

Johanna smiled big nodding. She already disappeared into the back of the pad. I sat up leaning back onto the couch watching James saunter over to the couch. I turned my attention to the man who is burrowing his head into his hands. My hand went to his shoulder rubbing the tense muscles, "What did Pike say?"

He mumbled something. I couldn't understand him. I raised an eyebrow edging closer to his head, "Say what? You mumbled James. I hate that when you do that."

James turned his head in his hands staring at me. His raspy voice came through my ears, "They took Enterprise away from me."

I frowned. Not only am I being forced to be assigned to another ship or go to a teaching job but they took James' prized possession away. I stood up, "That is just... just... stupid! How dare they take her away from you? You **love** the Enterprise as much as Scotty does which I still find a bit surprising. Anyways, what is the reason for such penalty?"

James heaved out a deep breath, "The survey mission was only supposed to be a survey mission. We were not to interfere with their destiny of being doomed. They were not supposed to see any futuristic technology that is before the caveman ages. I did the opposite of each one of those things. Apparently I broke many star fleet regulations."

I clenched my fists, "Not only do I find my situation stupid but I find this stupid. If I had to known that Star Fleet would be like this, I don't think I would of ever signed up."

I felt his hand wrap around mine. My eyes flickered towards our hands then to his face. He doesn't look happy either. I totally wouldn't if they took my ship away from me. He pulled me slightly to gesture to sit down next to him. James opened his arms for me to nest against his side, "There is nothing we could do. I was and still am pretty angry that they were taking you away from me and the Enterprise but now I am furious that the backstabbing vulcan threw me under the bus which ended in result of me losing the Enterprise and being forced to go back to the academy."

I furrowed my eyebrows together, "This is just not a good time for us."

James looked up to see Johanna standing there. James' free hand patted his lap, "Come here Johanna."

Johanna slowly walked towards us, "Is everything alright?"

James picked her up with one arm and have her nestle against his free side. He kissed the top of her head, "Everything will be alright."

I noticed Johanna picked the keyword up. **Will.** James turned his head towards me leaving a kiss now ontop of my head, "I am going out tonight. I can have left overs."

I gave a nod. I understand he wants to be alone especially with twice the bad news hitting him at once. I sat up leaving Jim's embrace, "Well don't act reckless. I don't want to drag your butt back here."

Jim's hand captured my chin pulling me towards his lips. I sighed into the kiss as it leaves me melting into nothingness. He pulled away, "I promise I won't."

Johanna gripped onto Jim's uniform shirt tighter, "Where are you going daddy? Are...Are you leaving us?"

James' face soften towards her. He gripped onto her cheek gently, "I would never leave you or your mother. I need my thinking time right now. I'll be back to read you a bed time story, I promise."

Johanna eyed him to see if there is any fault. Her face broke into a smile once she found none. She leaped up into his arms giving him a bear hug, "You better daddy. I want to know what happens next."

I chuckled standing up unbuttoning my uniform jacket, "Well then missy you better pick out what you want to eat."

Johanna hurriedly gave James a kiss to the cheek before running to the kitchen to look in the pantry. I shook my head at her antics. My attention turned towards back to James, "Please be safe at least for Johanna. Knowing the fact she cried when Spock almost died, I don't think I can handle her if anything happens to you."

James' hand went to my waist pulling me closer to him, "Don't worry. I'll make sure nothing happens. Now if cupcake comes again then I won't be able to hold back. I am just going to have a couple drinks at the near by bar. Walking distance, promise. I just want to think about all of this that is going on with you and me."

I bit my lip gently, "It better be walking distance and only a couple drinks. You can get pretty roudy when you are drunk. I heard from Nyota if you are to ask."

James let out a light breath. His lips gently touched upon my own. The little patter of feet came running in the living room. A box of what sounds to be dry noodles shaking around. I pulled away chuckling, "Mac and cheese, again?"

Johanna smiled big, "Mhmmm."

James' hand went down to her head ruffling her hair, "That is your all time favorite isn't it?"

Johanna nodded. I pulled away from James' grip picking the little one up. She held up the box in my face, "Pleassseeeee mommy?"

I let out a heavy sigh, "Fine but with hot dogs at least."

Her little arms went around my neck giving me a tight wrenching hug. I tapped her arms. I rasped out, "Okay you can let go now."

James gave her a kiss to her head then towards mine. He disappeared to our room to change into a pair of jeans and shirt with a jacket. I already took Johanna and myself to the kitchen to start getting the water boiling. James jingled the keys in his hands. I held out my hand, "James..."

He groaned, "I won't drive Abs I promise. I need to get into the pad somehow."

I shook my head, "After a few drinks you tend to do things that you said you wouldn't. Hand them over. Plus I'll let you in stupid."

He dragged his feet towards me as I was making sure Johanna isn't touching the stove. The curious thing is too excited for food. I felt the cool metal hit lightly into my palm. I glanced up at James, "I promise I'll let you in. Now go on and have your guy time."

James gave a slight wave, "I'll be back later tonight."

I gave a light nod. The door was slightly closing when I was about to catch Johanna touch the pot, "Woah! No Jo you cannot touch that! You'll burn yourself."

She pouted like always, "But it needs to cook faster~."

I shook my head at her, "It'll be done when it'll be done. Patience is the key Jo."


	4. Chapter 4

Johanna fell asleep on my lap leaving me in a compromising position. A mellow knock was brought against the door. My eyes flickered to the door then at Johanna. Well this is going to be hard. She refused to be brought to her bed as Jim promised that he would read a book to her before bed. The stubborn little kid. I gently moved her away from my body. I placed her head against my chest leading her to her toddler bed. I tucked her in her bed. I glanced back to the sleeping body. I left the door cracked open as I headed towards the door. I glanced at my watch having it read 2200_. _I open the door seeing a distressed Jim. He ran a hand through his hair walking past me. I raised an eyebrow at his behavior, "Shall I ask?"

I closed the door lightly behind me as I guessed James would be at. Our room. I could see him changing into his grey uniform, "What happened?"

James glanced up at me as he began buttoning his shirt, "An emergency meeting has been called."

I crossed my arms, "I thought you weren't captain anymore."

James halted for a second but recovered, "Pike made me his first officer. Spock has been transferred to a different star ship."

I rubbed my arm looking away, "They are just breaking all of us apart..."

James appeared out of no where, "I know... I'll figure something about the whole family on same ship thing. Don't you worry."

He slipped on his belt fastening it around his pant loops. I leaned against the door frame, "You know Jo waited for you. I had to give her a little story to keep her knickers untwisted. Sleep overcame her though but she was still pretty upset that you weren't here to finish off whatever story you started with her."

He paused with slipping his shoes on, "Dammit."

I sighed walking closer to him. I placed a hand on his shoulder, "She isn't going to hate you for it. If work came up then she would understand. She already knows what it was like when you were captain. So far that she knows that you are still captain."

A foot got into a shoe. Jim looked up at me with a tiny pained expression, "I was still at the bar when sleep overcame her. That would be lying to her. I was talking to Pike who decided to come at last minute."

I poked his nose, "See he is work so you're not lying. Work did come and take you as you came home rushing to put your uniform on. I don't want you driving though..."

James already slipped his other shoe on, "I only had two drinks."

I gave him a look, "James Tiberius Kirk, you cannot fool me in thinking that two drinks cannot do jack shit to you. Just one drink can do something to you."

He zipped past me to the closet that hangs both of our uniform jackets. He pulled his off putting it over his arm. He grabbed his hat, "I'll be fine promise."

I shook my head, "James... I can drive you there. Please."

James stopped walking towards the door to look at me, "Whatta about Johanna?"

I pointed to a sleep risen child who is rubbing her eyes looking at James. Her little voice sounded croaky from sleep, "Daddy?"

James ran a hand through his hair again, "Yes Jo?"

She opened her eyes to focus on him clearly, "Why are you in your uniform?"

I kneeled down to her height, "Daddy has been called into work. Work have followed him into his thinking time which was why he didn't come home earlier."

Johanna gave a little nod. She wrapped her arms around my neck. I stood up having her wrap her legs around my waist. My hand went to her back to give her support. I grabbed the keys, "Come on James, can't have Marcus waiting for you."

James followed me to the car after we locked up.

* * *

I stared at the retreating back of James T Kirk. He was fixing his jacket when he was walking in. Johanna passed out once again in her booster seat. James finished up his story on the way to HQ. I let out a breath glancing back at where James disappeared to. I wonder what have happened... I drove back home. Once home, I tucked Johanna back into bed. I ran a hand through my hair. James got me doing that now. I changed into pj shorts and a tank top. I snuggled into the bed James and I share. Something must be up for them to call for an emergency meeting. It has to be something outstandingly horrible or threatening for them to do so.

* * *

The bed side went down by the weight of someone. It was already morning as I could feel some sunlight peeking through the blinds. I stretched my body then opened my eyes. I cringed at the light when it shone directly into my eyes, "Damn sun..."

I rubbed them turning the other way away from the sun. I could make out a figure sitting on the bed. I sat up a little bit more, "James?"

James didn't move from his position or acknowledge me. I scooted closer to him putting my arms around his waist. I moved my head around his body to see his face. He looked distant. I studied him worriedly, "James... come on speak to me... what happened at that meeting?"

His jaw clenched as his shoulders start to shake. He started to break down. I rubbed his back, "Oh James..."

He turned his body so he was facing me. I looked into his shiny watery blues. His voice came out raspy, "Pike is dead. There is a John Harrison who is to blame for the archive but he killed Pike."

I brought him into my arms, "James... It's going to be okay. It'll always will be okay. You now have one more angel to look after you. One for each shoulder. Your dad and Pike would be able to nag you when you do something stupid. But they will also be proud of you."

A little beep of the communicator filled both of our ears. I refused to let James leave my arms. I reached over and grabbed the communicator. I flipped it open, "yeah?"

Spock's voice came through, "Abigail. Is Kirk with you?"

I looked down at James. I let out a sigh, "Yes. What is it?"

Spock spoke, "Commander. Mister Scot has found something in the wreckage of Harrison's ship. He has asked to see us right away."

James sprung to life, "I'll meet with you."

James closed the communicator that laid in my hand. James stood up but before he started to walk away I grabbed his hand. He stopped to look at me, "Abs."

I studied his eyes, "Let me come with you. Please. I don't want to leave you in this state. Johanna can stay with Bones for a little bit."

James studied me back before he gave a nod. I jumped up out of bed. James couldn't help but watch my movements. He groaned, "Need to stop wearing that to bed."

I raised an eyebrow looking down what I was wearing. It was just shorts and a tank last time I remembered. I crossed my arms, "Don't watch them bounce then."

I stuck my tongue out. He rolled his eyes, "Can't help it."

I shook my head heading to the closet. I pulled out a grey skirt and a black long sleeve. Basically the female version of James' outfit which consist of grey long slacks and black long sleeves. I changed into the garments and headed straight for Johanna's room. I changed her into a little sundress with sandals. James popped his head into Jo's room, "Ready?"

I gave a nod swinging Jo's backpack on my shoulder. She is on my free side of my hip. She wrapped her arms around my neck, "Mommy where are we going?"

I gave her a kiss to her cheek, "You're going to have a day with Papa. Daddy and I got some business to attend to for work."

She gave a slow nod. James already called Bones to meet us at HQ to hand over Johanna while we meet up with Spock and Scotty.

* * *

Spock and James were ahead of me in running to Scotty. It's hard to run in this stupid skirt. If it was short it would of been much easier but no it had to be a stupid pencil skirt. The two were already talking with Scotty. I met up with the three fixing my skirt which ridden up. James noticed it but focused on the coordinates that have been shown on the device. My eyes widened. Scotty spoke, "He went to one place we cannot go to."


	5. Chapter 5

I crossed my arms as James AND Spock made me stand outside of Marcus's meeting with the other higher ups. I find it not fair. They get the action. I held out my hand to examine my nails till I heard the door open. I looked up seeing James and Spock walking out. I pushed myself off the wall, "So...?"

James spoke, "We are going after him. We have been given permission to go after him with the help of missiles."

I held up my hand, "What do you mean by we? I cannot go. You heard Pike James."

Spock spoke this time, "I have found information of the regulations that there is indeed no such rule. You are back on the Enterprise with Kirk as the captain and I am the first officer."

I raised an eyebrow, "That seems fishy in the first place to the fact that it was made up."

James nodded, "Yes but now we must get ready to go back onto our home."

I grabbed his hand, "What about Johanna? If we are being called onto the Enterprise then that means Bones will be on board, same with everyone else that is called the crew of the Enterprise. This is already seem a dangerous mission I refuse to let that child on board."

James breathed in then let it out heavily. He glanced at Spock then at me, "Fine. We will... I don't know...I cannot send her to my family. You know how they are."

I looked up at him staring into his eyes, "I barely have any family. Only family I got is my brother. I don't trust him enough as it is. Either we find someone or I will stay grounded Captain."

James ruffled his hair, "You're making this difficult Abs."

Spock piped in, "She can stay with my father."

James and I spoke in unison, "No."

James turned his attention back to me, "I cannot leave you here on Earth. You are coming on board of the Enterprise. That's an order."

I puffed at my bangs, "Then find someone James Tiberius Kirk, or I will disobey orders and stay grounded."

I turned my heel walking out of the building. I walked around the courtyard breathing in the fresh air. The only one who is close enough for short notice is Matthew. I do not want to call him up. I am afraid he will show her his ways by accident and things would happen. I rubbed my arms from an invisible chill. I groaned pulling out my communicator. I flipped it open phoning in to Matthew.

A raspy sleepy voice ringed through the speaker, "Ello?"

I took a deep breath. I am already regretting this. In the distance, James has his arms crossed watching me with Spock by his side. Spock was going to say something till James stopped him. James watched me intently. I spoke, "Matthew. I need a favor."

I could hear a girl in the background, "_Matt come back to_ _bed._"

I dug my nails into the skin of my arm, "Matthew I hope that's not one of your one night stands."

I could hear shuffling, "What's it to you?"

I shook my head, "Please do not make me regret this decision as it is. I need a favor from you to take care of Johanna while James and I are on a mission. It's a very dangerous mission and I couldn't think of anyone else other than you or Jim's family. His family is back in Iowa soo you are the only choice left."

The sound of him going to the bathroom. I pinched my nose as I started to pace in frustration. Matthew spoke, "Okay. I can do it."

I continued to pinch my nose, "Well come now. Drop that one night stand and come over immediately. I'll have Bones drop her with me and you will meet me at my place okay?"

Matthew spoke a sleepy okay. I hung up on him. I turned my heel to see a watchful James and Spock. I pointed my finger at him, "There Captain, I called my stupid twin brother. He should be meeting us at our place to get her and her things. I already regret this as he has a whore with him right now and I don't want that infront of Johanna."

James undid his arms walking towards me. He placed his hands on each side of me rubbing my arms, "Don't worry. He won't do anything stupid with her there."

I grumbled, "Yeah right."

* * *

Johanna watched me on her bed as I placed some clothes in her mini suitcase. Johanna spoke, "Mommy where are we going?"

I poked her nose, "You are going with Uncle Mattie. Daddy and I are going on a very dangerous mission that you cannot go on. I want you to behave yourself when you are with your uncle. Make sure he doesn't do anything stupid."

She smiled big, "I won't!"

I finished packing her suitcase. I picked the suitcase and her backpack filled with toys carrying them to the living room. I heard a woman's laugh in the other room. Who can that be? I peered around the corner to the front door. Matthew and apparently one of his one night stands that decided to stay with him for a bit longer. James has his arms crossed. He was already dressed in the black onesie suit with yellow strips on his collarbones. I already been dressed in that before Johanna arrived with Bones. I felt little hands grip my pants leg. I looked down seeing Johanna hiding behind me staring at the two people. I cleared my throat and the woman stopped talking about who knows what. I haven't been paying attention. All I have been paying attention to is ways to kill my brother for bringing his one night stand with him. James looked behind him noticing Johanna peering behind my pant leg. He walked over picking the child up, "Let's make sure you have everything Jo."

Jim tickled her making her giggle. Her giggles were carried down the hall. I crossed my arms glaring at Matthew, "I thought I said no one night stands."

Matthew nervously rubbed the back of his neck. The woman spoke, "Excuse me. I am not a one night stand."

I raised both of my eyebrows in question, "Is this true Matthew?"

Matt nervously laughed, "Well...you see-."

The woman interrupted him, "It is true."

I gestured Matthew to come towards me. He hesitantly walked towards me. I pulled his ear to go around the corner into James and I's bedroom. I closed the door. I closed my eyes taking a deep breath, "Matt... I swear you are going to make me go into prison for wanting to kill you for the stupid stuff you do."

Matthew sat down on my bed watching me, "I tried to make her leave. She insists that she meets my daughter. She says we are an item now. Which I really do not want. I don't want to deal with women and their crazy antics."

James poked his head in the bedroom, " Abs we have to go now. We are supposed to be already onboard."

I glanced back at James, "Alright hold on. I'm finishing up."

I turned my attention back to Matthew, "Matt you gave her up. You handed her to me. She is my daughter. I want what is best for her. I have raised her since she was a new born since that excuse of a woman wanted to put her on the road for her to die. Yes you made sure that she was sent to me but still you gave up your right when you signed the adoption papers. She is legally my daughter."

Matthew stood up raising his voice a bit, "And you don't think I know that Abigail! I know that I gave her up so she can have a better lifestyle. I know that even though I barely knew you at the time that you were the best option than me or any foster family. I cannot change my lifestyle. No matter what I will always be playing around with women!"

I headed towards Matthew. I poked his chest, "This favor and another favor I am asking of you. Do not I mean do not bring your lifestyle near Johanna. I am letting you take care of her while James and I are on a mission so you better damn well take care of her. No fooling around. No women at your place. And god forbid do not leave her alone so you can fool around. I will check up on you so I can see how Johanna is faring along. You better not mess this up Matthew. I want that whore that is outside on my door way to be gone before you even go home. Do you understand me?"

Matthew grumbled, "Yes."

I headed to the door opening it open, "Good now, James and I have to go board the Enterprise. I will com you once I am settled."

He gave a nod. James held onto Johanna who has been eyeing the woman at the door. I brought a smile to my face giving a kiss to Johanna who giggled at the amount of kisses I was giving her. James smiled. I held out my arms and she instantly went to my arms. I hugged her tight, "Remember what I said Jo."

Johanna repeated what I have said earlier, "Behave for Uncle Mattie. Got it."

James kissed the top of her head, "Be safe kid."

Johanna held out her arms to James, "Daddy!"

I saw Matthew cringe at that word. James squeezed her tight till she had to tap Jim's arm to say okay now okay. I could feel the tension between James and Matthew. James handed her to Matthew. Matt adjusted Jo in his arms. I gave a look to matthew, "Remember I'll com later to check up on you two and say good night."

Johanna's face brightened, "Be safe mommy daddy."

I gave her a nod. The unfortunately three of them left the pad. I groaned loudly, "I fucking can't stand my brother."

James looked towards me grabbing my hand, "We need to go now. Also we need to talk later once we are settled on board."

I gave a light nod as he lead me to our car to head to the loading bay.


	6. Chapter 6

James made sure that I got on board first before he does as he has to make sure he tie up loose ends at the bay. I pulled my blue science division dress down slightly as it rode up when walking through a bunch of people. I felt my stomach shift. I place a hand onto it, not thinking of anything of it. I need to make sure Bones, Spock and James made it safely to the Enterprise. I could hear Scotty argue with a yeoman. I hurriedly walk over to Scotty, "Hey Scotty. What's going on?"

Scotty huffed and puffed. James came into view with Spock and Bones and some woman on his tail. Scotty turned towards James, "Captain."

James questioned, "Is there a problem Mr. Scot?"

Scotty nodded, "Aye Captain. I was just explaining to this gentleman."

He gestured to the man behind him, "that I cannae authorize any weapons on board this ship without knowing what's inside them."

Spock spoke up, "Mr. Scott raises yet another point..."

James turned to Spock, "Report to the bridge."

That's odd. James seem different some how. My eyes flickered to the woman studying her studying the weaponry. I appeared beside Bones. I whispered, "Who is she?"

Bones glanced down at me, "She is our new science officer. Dr. Carol Wallace. She is an advance weaponry person."

I wouldn't take my eyes off her till I caught Jim speak with Scotty.

Jim started, "Mr. Scott, I understand your concerns, but we need these torpedoes on board."

Scotty looked like he wasn't going to have any of it, "Due respect, sir, but photon torpedoes run on fuel. Now I cannae detect the type of fuel that's in the compartments on these torpedoes because it's shielded."

I need to ask James where he got those torpedoes in the first place. Scotty continued, "Now I asked for the specifications but he said..."

The man behind him spoke, "it's classified."

Scotty nodded his head, "It's classified. so I said no specs, no signature!"

I looked up at Sulu's voice. He was notifying James the ship is ready for take off. Scotty started walking away after excusing himself. I heard Bones start to speak, "Jim your vitals are way off."

I turned my head to that new information. He seemed fine to me a few hours ago... What the hell happen to him while I was away? Jim looked at me and Bones, "Report to the med bay."

Bones' lips went to a straight line. Bones looked at me as Jim ran off to follow Scotty. Bones spoke, "I want you to follow him. I know you were going to follow him in the first place. But Abigail make sure that he doesn't get too riled up."

I gave a nod, "I cannot make promises. He is a hard headed buffoon sometimes. He made me call my brother to babysit Johanna. I didn't like that one bit."

I crossed my arms starting to follow James. I could hear the two arguing. I caught at the end of their conversation. Scotty spoke, "Do you accept my resignation or not!"

James yelled back, "I do! "

I paused in my walking staring at the two. No scotty can't go. He just can't. James what the hell did you do? The two stared at each other till James spoke, "I do. You are relieved, Mr. Scot."

Scotty looks heart broken. He caught a glimpse of me standing by one of the pillars. He looked back at Jim taking a step closer, "Jim for the love of God. Do not use those torpedoes. Think about Abby."

Scotty handed his P.A.D.D to Jim. Jim took it in his hands. Scotty made his friend give his P.A.D.D. too. James looked down thinking over the decision he just made. I took a few steps closer reaching my arm out to James' arm. He glanced towards me but then looked away. I rubbed his arm, "James... you need to calm down. Please."

James shook his head moving away from my grasp. My shoulders slumped. I heard him speak out, "I thought I told you to report to med bay Lt. Commander McCoy."

A shudder came through my bones at the tone of his voice. It's not heartless but it seemed empty and not all there. I watched his retreating form to change into his command uniform. I hugged myself. Something isn't right at all with him. I dragged my feet towards the lift to head to the med bay.

* * *

The ship undocked from the docking bay. I slumped into my chair staring off to space. James' voice echoed through the halls and areas, "Attention, crew of the Enterprise. As most of you know, Christopher Pike, former captain of this ship and our friend, is dead. The man who killed him has fled our system and is hiding on the Klingon homeworld, somewhere he believes we are unwilling to go. We are on our way there now. Per Admiral Marcus, it is essential that our presence go undetected. Tensions between the Federation and the Klingon Empire have been high. Any provocation could lead to an all-out war. I will personally lead a landing party to an abandoned city on the surface of Kronos."

I stood up straight at the sound of that. I highly doubt he would take me but I will try to get him to.

He continued, "Where we will capture the fugitive, John Harrison and return him to Earth so he can face judgement for his actions. All right. Let's go get this son of a bitch. Kirk out."

That's why he is all acting weird. Pike was his mentor. A father to him in a way. All the sudden he is dead and James feel it is his duty to take John Harrison out. He wants revenge. Bones walked over to me, "Is something wrong Abigail?"

I shook my head out of my thoughts looking up at Bones, "James... is acting different towards me and to everyone... I think he is out for revenge on this guy."

Bones' face went grim, crossing his arms, "That may be why..."


	7. Chapter 7

How is it so far guys?

* * *

I commed James on the bridge, "James.."

James hit the button to respond, "Yes Lt. commander McCoy?"

I breathed in a deep breath, "I would like to request to talk to you privately if you are available Captain."

James started, "If it is not busin-."

I interrupted him, "It is business related. Just come down to the med bay for a few moments please Captain. I ask nothing else."

I heard James heave out a groan, "Alright Kirk out."

Good he is coming down to the med bay. I waited patiently for the captain. I twirled an instrument around in my hands to occupy myself. The doors swished open moments later. I looked up to see a somewhat irritated James. I stood up, "Sit."

I pointed to the chair I once was occupying. He sat down grumbling to himself. I grabbed a rolly chair and rolled it towards him, "James... you have been irritable and you are irrational. Especially with Scotty."

I whispered the next part, "And me..."

My eyes met with his, "I know that you want to go after this guy to avenge for Pike's death but it's controlling you a bit."

I felt my stomach churn. I gripped onto my stomach, feeling sick. James crossed his arms, "That is none of your business Abs."

I stood up letting go of my stomach. I ignored the feeling it is giving me. I clenched the instrument in my hand, "It is every damn right my business James. I am your girlfriend. I do care about your ass. I do love you. God Dammit James! I can't help but worry about you since Bones mentioned your vitals are acting up plus the actions you give out. I know we are captain to senior medical officer but that doesn't mean to be cold hearted at times. I just want to help you."

James clenched his fists standing up now, "Stand down Lt. Commander."

I could feel tears well up. I slapped him. I have no idea what brought me to it but I slapped him. Hard. A red mark was already surfacing. What the hell? Luckily Bones and the others are on a different section of the bay. I placed the instrument on the table, "You stand down Captain. All I wanted to do is help you with your grieving. I guess that won't happen now."

James frowned, "What are you saying Abigail?"

I wiped my eyes from the free falling tears, "I am saying I am through. I am asking you to leave Captain."

James stared at me for a second. He hesitated to reach out but decided against it. He turned his heel leaving the bay. I could feel my shoulders shake. I am never this emotional. I am never like this. Am I the one changing and James always been like that? No... He never been cold hearted to me unless that's middle school and beginning of high school. I felt arms envelop around me. A reassuring rub to my tense back muscles start to calm me down. I nuzzled my face into the person's shirt.

"Shhhh... It's okay. Jim is having a rough time right now. And apparently you are too," the southern accent came to.

I looked up at Bones sniffling, "H-He wasn't like this, this morning. I...I guess it is now coming to him...hard..."

I felt my chin brought upward. My blurry eye sight could see a blurry Bones. He spoke softly, "He needs you Abigail."

The Enterprise started to jolt. Bones gripped onto me making sure I don't fall. Bones dragged me towards the bridge, "I need to talk to you later."

I tilt my head in question but I will save the question later. Bones left me in the lift as he went to confront James on what is going on. Uhura and Spock entered the Lift. Uhura saw me with red streaks down my face. She instantly turned towards me, "Oh my god, what happened Abigail?"

I sniffled, "I...I broke up with James..."

Spock this time turned his head towards me. Uhura opened her arms for me to waddle through. I welcomed her arms embrace, "He... He... changed... I tried helping him b-but he wouldn't let me... this whole revenge thing is getting to his h-head. I just want to help him... I-I love him."

I felt her pet my hair, "It's going to be okay Abigail. Don't worry."

I rested my head against her shoulder as the lift took us I have no idea where.

* * *

Apparently James, Spock, Uhura and some other guys are going to Kronos. The lift took me back to the bridge. I stepped off seeing Sulu in the chair. I raised an eyebrow. I stepped next to Bones. Bones looked over to Sulu, "Mr. Sulu remind me to never piss you off."

Sulu smirked. I also noticed Chekov is not on the bridge. I questioned, "Where is my favorite russian?"

Sulu glanced over to me, "The Captain made him Chief Engineer."

My heart sank. I know Chekov is a whizz but putting that much onto his shoulders is pushing it. Bones glanced down to me, "Abigail. Now can we talk?"

I gave him a nod, "Where to Bones?"

He held out his hand showing the way to the lift. I walked onto the lift with him behind me. The doors closed and the lift went whereever. Bones stopped the lift turning towards me, "How far along are you?"

I stammered, "W-what? I...I am not pregnant Bones."

He gave me a knowing look, "You have all of the symptoms. I noticed you grasp at your stomach occasionally from what I suspect is from morning sickness. You haven't heaved yet have you?"

I shook my head. He continued, "Also you are beyond emotional towards Jim. Also your stomach looks slightly pooched out. You looked to be at maybe 2 months in."

I frowned. That is around the time James left for the Nibiru mission.I wiped my forehead, "I cannot... cannot be pregnant Bones. We used protection."

Bones gave me another knowing look, "You do know that sometimes condoms break."

I wringed out the hem of my dress, "It didn't look like there was a leak at all! I certainly am not pregnant Bones. I would know if I am. I am a doctor too you know?"

Bones' lips went to a straight line, "At least do some tests to be positively sure."

I crossed my arms, "Fine but it's between patient and doctor confidentiality. I don't want him knowing...yet... He would get all overly-protective plus with the side of his revenge going on. I don't want that right now. IT's beset that him and I took a break."

Bones sighed, "Alright fine. Come on let's get blood drawn."

I crinkled my nose at the sound of that. I hate needles.


	8. Chapter 8

I stared at the piece of paper haunt me to no wit's end. The results of the tests. Bones wanted to any text imaginable to make sure just in case a test decide to mess up. It's pretty important to know if I am or not well you know being on a star ship. I groaned falling onto my back on my bed. Closing my eyes, every thought that seem to haunt me since Bones mention that I could easily be pregnant decided to take over my thought process. That was a few days ago. And today was the day that I have gotten my results back. I swallowed into my parched throat. When did it become parched? Oh yeah when I read _The Results are..._ My hands rubbed against my lidded eyes. I turned my head towards the results that lay innocently beside me. I picked it up rereading it again to make sure I am not going crazy. It's not possible but apparently it is possible. I skimmed through to the end of the paper with it saying _Your initial appointment is tomorrow at 1400. _Hopefully we do not get into trouble by then. A couple days ago, James came back on board with some cuts and bruises. I treated him along with the others who went down onto Kronos. It worried me greatly. I hear from Nyota James was being a spontaneous risk taker. He earned a punch to the arm for that. He had to question about the punch but I was maneuvering around the question talking about his health. Bones wanted me to come with him when it was time to draw blood to the mysterious man. He has a weird aura surrounding him. Bones should be now working on looking at the man's blood. The man when we were taking his blood, kept eyeing me. I sat up rubbing my neck. I want to find out why he was eyeing me.

* * *

I peeked around the corner of the brig. The man stood staring at the entrance. His voice broke my trance, "Come. I am guessing on a routine medical trip."

I moved more inside the area of the brig. I walked closer giving a slight nod to the brig's keeper. I stopped once I was close enough to the glass. I looked up at the man, "Why were you eyeing me the whole time of taking a blood sample and leaving?"

The man answered, "You are carrying something aren't you?"

I raised an eyebrow in question, "Me carrying something? Don't be stupid."

The man walked towards the right side of his cell, "I mean as a human being."

I swallowed once again. My parched throat refused to cooperate. My eyes turned into a glare. The man gave a small very small smile, "Oh... so I was right am I right... Lt. Commander?"

I spoke lowly, "How did you figure out?"

He walked back in front of me rolling his eyes, "It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that one out. Even though you tried to conceal your emotions, they swirl more than ever underneath that mask. Your stomach has a slight protruding bump to it. And the fact you also keep giving sideway glances at your dear captain. He's the father is he not?"

I frowned. I pointed my finger at him, "I do not know how you can simply figure that out within one meeting but if you speak one word of this to the Captain or to anyone else, I make sure you have a painful death."

The man laced his hands together behind him, "Getting fiesty for a mother-to-be. I suggest you calm down before your levels sky rocket. Also good luck in killing me."

I clenched my fists tighter. I turned my heel walking back to the entrance. I didn't notice who I push past till the man spoke out, "Oh captain."

I held in my breath till I was out of the vicinity. I let out a deep breath. Just one meeting and the man already knows so much.

* * *

James looked behind him where a furious looking Abigail walked off to. His attention went back to the man in front of him. James spoke lowly, "What. Did. You. Do. To. Her?"

The man unlaced his hands to cross his arms, "It's not I who did something to her but you to her."

James narrowed his eyes on the man, "What do you mean?"

The man gave a little smirk, "Oh she hasn't told you anything. Well I shouldn't be the one to tell you as she has threatened my life upon her hands if I were to spread what you did to her."

James thought for a moment, "The slight cold shoulder? That isn't enough to make her threaten your or anyone's life. Anyways this is not what I am here for. Why is there a man in that torpedo?"

The man spoke, " There are men and women in all of those torpedoes, captain. I put them there."

James glanced at Spock who silently arrived. James spoke again, "Who the hell are you?"

The man sat down speaking, "A remnant of a time long past. Genetically engineered to be superior so as to lead others to peace in a world at war. But we were condemned as criminals, forced into exile."

The man took a breath, "For centuries we slept, hoping when we awoke things would be different. But as the result of the destruction of Vulcan, your Starfleet began to aggressively search distant quadrants of space. My ship was found adrift. I alone was revived."

James spoke, "I looked up 'John Harrison.' Until a year ago, he didn't exist."

The man spoke up louder, "John Harrison was a fiction created the moment I was awoken by your Admiral Marcus to help him advance his cause. A smokescreen to conceal my true identity. My name is Khan."

The two were face to tilted his head in question, "Why would a Starfleet Admiral ask a 300-year old frozen man for help?"

Khan answered, "Because I am better."

James questioned, "At what?"

Khan answered once again, "Everything. Alexander Marcus needed to respond to an uncivilized threat in a civilized time and for that he needed a warrior's mind. My mind. To design weapons and warships."

Spock spoke this time, "you are suggesting the Admiral violated every regulation he vowed to uphold simply because he wanted to exploit your intellect."

James was thinking in his mind. Is this why Marcus wanted Abs off of his ship? He wanted to render him useless without her? Too many questions popped into the Captain's head. He focused back onto the conversation before him.

Khan spoke, "He sent you to use those weapons. To fire my torpedoes on an unsuspecting planet. And then he purposely crippled your ship in enemy space, leading to one inevitable outcome. The Klingons would come searching for whomever was responsible, and you would have no chance of escape. Marcus would finally have the war he talked about. The war he always wanted."

James couldn't believe him. James shook his head, "No. No. I watched you open fire in a room full of unarmed Starfleet officers. You killed them in cold blood!"

Khan roared, "Marcus took my crew from me."

James pressed the matter, "You are a murderer!"

Khan turned his back onto James walking to the farthest area of the cell, "He used my friends to control me. I tried to smuggle them to safety by concealing them in the very weapons I had designed, but I was discovered. I had no choice but to escape alone. And when I did, I had every reason to suspect that Marcus had killed every single one of the people I hold most dear. So I responded in kind."

Khan glanced back towards the two, "My crew is my family, Kirk. Is there anything you would not do for your family?"

James thought over his crew, his first officer, Johanna and lastly Abigail. Sulu commed the brig, "A proxmity alert sir, there's a ship at warp heading right for us."

James shook his head looking around, "Klingons?"

Khan spoke, "At warp? No, Kirk. We both know who it is."

Sulu spoke, "I don't think so. It's not coming at us from Kronos."

James started to back away. He needs to tend to the crisis that would form at the bridge then see what is going on with Abigail. James spoke urgently, "Move Khan to med bay and post 6 security officers on him. Tell Lt Commander Abigail McCoy to report to the bridge."

The woman spoke, "Yes captain."

* * *

A com went through the medical bay, "Lt. Commander Abigail McCoy please report to the bridge. I repeat, Lt. Commander Abigail McCoy please report to the bridge."

I raised an eyebrow in question then realization hit me. The man might of told James since James was the last one there to talk to the man. I clenched my fists standing up. Bones looked at me with a raised eyebrow. I shrugged, "I didn't tell him anything but I think a man who might of."

Bones walked with me to the lift, "What do you mean a man might of?"

I looked at Bones, "That man in the brig. He knows. Somehow he fucking knows. He watched me a few times when you were taking blood, he noticed. In ONE meeting bones. I don't know but I don't think I want to know. He might of told James, but why else would James who is my ex call me onto the bridge?"

Bone' lips went to a straight line, "I am not sure especially if we are in red alert."

The lift doors swished open, "That's what I am afraid of."

I stepped in having the doors close my vision of Bones. A few stray hairs is coming out of my bun. I moved the hairs behind my ear. Damn hairs. I still haven't com Johanna. That child must be worried. I really have no idea how to tell her that James isn't her real dad and that he simply took the position as Jo forced it upon him when she was an infant. I rubbed my arm to get rid of the thoughts. The doors open to the bridge. I stepped out to stand beside James.

James spoke to Sulu," Shields."

Sulu answered, "Aye, captain."

James noticed a presence beside him. He glanced up at me. I laced my hands behind my back looking straight forward. I can feel his stare onto me. I spoke, "You request my presence captain?"

James stared at me for a second then looked at the screen, "Yes Lt. Commander I have. Answer my question, What did I do to you?"

I held my breath staring at the screen. I want a distraction. Something distract this man. Please. Uhura spoke, "They're hailing us sir."

James glanced back then back to the screen, "On Screen. Broadcast shipwide, for the record."

Marcus's face was broadcasted onto the screen, "Captain kirk."

Good distraction. I don't have to tell him anything just yet.

James took a breath, "Admiral Marcus. I wasn't expecting you. That's a hell of a ship you got there."

Marcus spoke in response, "And I wasn't expecting to get word that you'd taken Harrison into custody in violation of your orders. I also wasn't expecting to see Lt. Commander McCoy standing beside you."

My eyes shifted towards James. James shifted in his seat, "Well, we had to improvise when our warp core unexpectedly malfunctioned. With having Lt. Commander McCoy on board, there are no regulations to the fact of having more than one family member on board. If there are no regulations regarding to the cause, then your orders are invalid. She respectively belongs here. But you already knew that, didn't you sir?"

Marcus spoke, "I don't take your meaning."

James spoke up, "Well, that's why you're here, isn't it? To assist with our repairs? Why else would the head of Starfleet personally come to the edge of the Neutral Zone?"

My eyes flickered to sulu as he spoke, "Captain, they're scanning our ship."

James innocently asked, "Is there something I can help you find, sir?"

Marcus spoke, "Where is your prisoner, kirk?"

James spoke of regulation, "per Starfleet regulation, I am planning on returning Khan to Earth to stand trial."

Marcus cursed, "Well, shit. You talked to him. This is exactly what I was hoping to spare you from. I took a tactical risk and I woke that bastard up, believing that his superior intelligence could help us protect ourselves from whatever came at us next. But I made a mistake."

This is going to be a long conversation. I tuned the two out. James doesn't know that I am holding his child. However this Khan person gave him clues as that James did something to me. Which he did, but he might think it's something else. Spock stood beside me. I glanced up at him then at the screen. James spoke, "He's in engineering sir. But I'll have him moved to the transporter room right away."

The transmission ended. James glanced at me then at Spock. He looked at Sulu, "Do not drop those shields Mr. Sulu."

James stood up walking around. I watched his every move without giving any thought to what the others and him are saying. James sat back down on the captain's chair, "Punch it."

The Enterprise went into warp. James looked up at me, " I think we need to talk."

I nervously rubbed my laced hands together, "Captain I shall advise we should talk later. At the moment, you are busy with having to deal with the Admiral."

James frustratedly ran a hand through his hair, "Always the same Abigail who likes to put off something that she doesn't want to do or talk about. You never changed from when we were kids did you?"

My eyes flickered towards the captain glaring, "Same goes for you with Marcus's daughter. I heard about that. She talked around with a nurse or two."

I took note James clenched and unclenched his fists on the arm rests. James spoke lowly, "That is none of your business."

I clenched my jaw, "Captain I do not see how I am to help on the bridge as I am a senior medical officer doctor and I would be needed in medical bay. This is not where my position suggests I should be."

James' voice came out hard, "You are dismissed Lt. Commander."

I unlaced my hands heading to the lift. I could feel Spock and Nyota's eyes watch me. The lift doors closed to the lift. The lift started moving and I started crying. Dammit James.


	9. Chapter 9

I didn't go back to the bay. I don't want to deal with people. McCoy will get into a hissy fit that James have made me cry once again. I rubbed my red swollen eyes. He is making it harder to tell him at the right time. Marcus's daughter ran past me heading to the bridge. Well isn't that cute? My room door opened to my key. I stepped inside and immediately my computer was being hailed. Who could be hailing me at this hour? I know it's not late but it might be late on Earth if the hail is from Earth. I plopped down on my chair hitting a button to answer it. Little Johanna's face popped infront of me, "Mommy!"

A smile was brought onto my face, "Hey there Jo."

Johanna frowned, "You were crying weren't you?"

I sniffled a little bit shaking my head, "No I was not."

Johanna fought against me, "Were too!"

I responded back, "were not Johanna. Do not say were too missy. Let me talk to your uncle."

The scenery shifted as Matthew grabbed the com, "Hey there Abigal!"

He frowned also, "Johanna was right, you were crying."

I glared at my brother, "Shut it. You two are too observing."

Matthew shook his head, "It's noticeable Abby. What happened?"

His tone sounded serious. I wiped a stray tear away. I looked at the male replication of me, "Is she near you?"

Matthew looked around then shook his head, "She went to the living room to watch some cartoons. What's up?"

I sighed undoing my hair bun, "I... I broke up with James..."

I noticed Matt's jaw clenched. I continued, "I-I am also pregnant... with his child."

Matt started towards his bedroom door closing the door, "I am going to murder that bastard for leaving you when in need. You are carrying his child for heaven's sake."

I spoke up, "Matthew, he didn't leave me. I left him. His personality changed drastically from when we left Earth. He was basically giving me the cold shoulder. Plus he doesn't know that I am pregnant. I want to keep it that way. He is being a jerk and if he finds out he would be an overprotective jerk."

Matthew stayed silent. I groaned, "Don't tell Jo either. Don't tell her what is going on over here. I want her to be happy and not go into a depression or something of the sort because James is no longer in our li-."

The ship jolted hard enough that I fell out of the chair hitting the ground. Matthew's voice came urgent, "Abigail! what is going on? Are you okay?!"

I groaned rolling onto my back. I landed onto a table then onto the ground. I closed my eyes placing a hand onto my little bump. I felt something warm and sticky. I opened my eyes urgently holding my hand to my face. It's blood. I got up quickly, "I...I am bleeding... Oh my god... the baby."

I rushed out of the room leaving matthew on the computer freaking out. The ship jolted more. The jolts made me hit the wall a few times while running towards the medical bay. I started to pant. This is not good. The sake of the baby is in danger. Tears stung my eyes as I continued my trek to the medical bay. The jolts stopped. The doors swished open and Bones and everyone else who occupied the bay glanced towards me. Bones did a double take rushing towards me, "Abigail! What happened!"

I looked up at the man with blurred vision, "I fell... onto a table and onto the ground then a couple walls while heading here."

I grabbed his hands. My blood on my hands went onto his hands, "Please Bones... Save the baby."

Bones ushered me to an examination table. The blood already dripped down my legs. I could feel a stare from across the room. My eyes met a certain blue eyes. Khan. I winced when Bones cut the sticky wet uniform dress around my torso. I tried occupying myself while Bones checked on everything. Khan was still staring. A nurse came over to help Bones. Khan spoke, "You didn't tell him did you?"

I hissed in pain, "H-he doesn't need to know. He has the whole ship to be concerned about not me."

Bones looked up from my stomach, "Abigail, I have a heart beat still but it's faint."

I felt tears sting my eyes once again. I let out a yelp as the doors swished open. Bones inputted a hypospray to help fight off any infections that may have went inside. I heard a voice that I did not want to hear.

"Abs?"

I turned my head towards the door seeing James standing there. Another hypospray was injected earning another yelp. James' presence appeared beside me. James voice rose to panic, "Abs, Abby what happened?"

Bones spoke for me, "She is going to lose the baby Jim. You need to leave now."

Bones gestured a nurse to escort James away. James stared at my body and the blood leaking out of my form. He shook his head to focus on what he came here for. He walked over to Khan. Khan spoke, "I am surprised she didn't tell you. I am also surprised you didn't noticed at all in the beginning."

James harden his look, " Tell me everything you know about that ship."

Khan responded, "Dreadnought class. 2x the size, 3x the speed. Advanced weaponry. Modified for a minimal crew. Unlike most Federation vessels, it's built solely for combat."

James spoke, "I will do everything I can to make you answer for what you did... But right now I need your help."

Khan questioned, "In exchange for what?"

James answered, "You said you'd do anything for your crew. I can guarantee their safety."

Khan whispered, "Captain. You can't even guarantee the safety of your own crew, let alone your unborn child."

With those very words, I could feel my consciousness slipping. I lost a good amount of blood. Yes the cut was minimal but that does not beat the internal bleeding. The heart monitor beeped loudly. James glanced behind him. He rushed over to me. I could lightly feel his hands move my sweaty hair off my face, "Abs don't you do this."

A ghost of a smile brought upon my lips, "D-Don't worry about m-me. I am just one person."

I could feel Bones poking around my stomach. James grabbed my hand, "Don't say that. You were always that one person that I wanted to be with. Those times in high school, middle school and late elementary school were because I was trying to make you jealous. You know that saying of who ever picks on you must like you. I took that saying and I did exactly that to you. I picked on you because I liked you. Another genius like me was around. I wasn't alone. I didn't want to be alone. I was glad you lived a relatively close distance."

I felt a needle inject into my skin as the new blood pump back into my system. A small smile formed as I let out a little laugh, "Y-you were a jerk then and still can be a jerk now."

Bones looked up from his work. He managed to stop the bleeding. He found the internal bleeding was somewhere else. It was in my upper stomach area where my organs have been pushed up cause of the womb. A nurse was cleaning me up from the blood as another nurse was moving the emergency tools for surgery away. James glanced down to my now stitched up body then back towards my eyes, " I'll always be your jerk."

Bones came back from washing his hands and putting on a new uniform shirt, "Good news. I was able to save the kid. All you need is-."

My heart monitor started beeping like crazy till it started to flat line. Bones rushed to my side pushing James out of the way, "I need a clear table. She lost a good amount of blood during the emergency surgery. The new blood wasn't entering her body fast enough."

James clenched his jaw. He finally found out he was a father, an actually father and his baby is not dying till Abs started to flat line. James turned his face towards Khan, "Are you coming with me or not?"

Khan was erased from his shackles. James has to do everything he can to make sure that his child and Abs will make it safe.

* * *

James and Khan were deployed into space. They were shot into space to go into a little hole that is connected to a hanger of the Dark Enterprise. Their mission is to take down Marcus and save the Enterprise. James' mission is to save his crew especially Abigail and his unborn child. If she makes it that is...


	10. Chapter 10

Bones was able to stabilize me. The heart monitor beeping continued to beep at a regular pace. A second pair of beeping was at a regular pace also. I groaned from the pain from my stomach. The baby. It's still alive. That's the 2nd pair of beeps. A smile brought onto my face as I rub gently on my stomach. Jim knows about the child now. Bones entered my medical room with a frown, "Abigail."

I raised an eyebrow at his actions, "Whats wrong Bones?"

Bones looked down then stared into my eyes, "Jim's dead."

My heart started to stop at the news. I started to ruffle with my sheets to get out of bed while taking the heart pads and what not off of my skin. Bones' hands start to push me down, "Abigail you need to rest!"

Tears stung my eyes, "I don't care Bones! I love James! I want to see him, goddammit!"

Bones frowned having one eyebrow up, "Let me at least help you out of the bed."

I moved my arms away from him, "I can do it on my own."

I slowly went out of bed. I took shaky steps out of the room. I looked around till I saw a body bag laying on the table. I gulped hard. I walked closer to the body bag. The top part was open to see who it was when it first arrived. A hand shot up to my mouth as tears sprung out. I could feel my knees start to buckle. A pair of arms wrapped around my waist gently enough to not harm the baby or the stitches. The arms belong to Scotty. My hand shakingly reached over to James' face. The pads of my fingers gracefully touch his rough yet smooth skin of his cheek. He is still warm meaning he just died not too long ago. My voice came out raspy, "H-how?"

Scotty spoke, " The warp core chamber. He saved us all."

Bones sat over next to the tribble I saw him working on earlier of the week. It started to purr. My eyes shot towards the tribble. It was dead. Completely dead. Impossible. Bones ordered for a crya tube. Bones moved over to James with Marcus's daughter on his tail. Scotty moved me away. I reached out, "N-no. L-let me be with him. P-please."

Bones glanced up quickly, "I can't let you do that Abigail. Let us work on him to revive him."

I watched them take a man out of the tube and replace the vacant space with James' body. The admiral's daughter inputted a code. I buried my face into Scotty's uniform sobbing. I couldn't watch this anymore. I whispered to Scotty, "Please take me back to my room."

Scotty nodded helping me towards my medical room.

* * *

2 weeks have passed and everyday I have visited James. I have grown slightly bigger as it began to push to almost three months along. I have healed nicely, as for James he was in a coma since Bones injected his blood with Khan's. Bones reassured me James will come back to life. The tribbles did, he said. I have faith in a tribble's journey that James could pull through. Johanna went back under my care once I have settled in back in the pad. I looked at my watch, it reads 1300. Johanna pulled on my hand, "Can we see daddy nooooow?"

I gave a light chuckle, "Yes yes, we are on the way to see him Jo. Be patience."

She looked around the elevator, "Make it go faster~!"

I ran my hand through her hair, "I cannot possibly do that Jo. It has a mind of it's own plus I'm a doctor not an engineer. Remember that."

Johanna crossed her arms, "You sound like papa."

I chuckled as the doors open, "I do work with him."

Johanna decided to take off knowing exactly which room to go into. She skidded to a stop at the door way. Her face brightened as she ran inside the room. I sighed heavily. That child. I walked at a normal pace to Jim's room. I moved my hair out of my face, "Johanna Alexis you do not run off from me. Something could happen to you and I wouldn't be able to stop whatever comes to you."

My gaze went to a now awoken Jim and Spock. Johanna was laying next to James snuggled into his side. Bones was checking his vitals. Spock spoke, "You are welcome Jim."

Spock glanced behind him seeing me, "Abigail."

He gave a nod to me. I gave him one back, "Spock."

James' eyes locked onto mine. Spock turned back to James, "I shall go Jim."

James gave a nod. Bones picked up Johanna, "Come on Jo, I'll get you a couple of cookies. These two need to have adult time."

Johanna scrunched up her nose, "Not here!"

I let out a chuckle, "Johanna we are just going to talk. Run along with your papa."

Johanna eyed James and me. James nudged her little leg to get her attention. James gave her a small smile, "Go on. Get your cookies."

Johanna hugged Bones as he started to walk out with Spock. She eyed the two of us. I let out a huge sigh once the child was out of earshot and viewing distance. James scooted a bit patting the side of him. I hesitantly walked towards his bed. I eyed the vacant spot next to him, "I shouldn't. I will intrude into your resting time."

James grabbed my wrist pulling me into the bed making me climb on. His arm went around my shoulders. We both didn't speak for a long time just his arm draped over my shoulders. He broke eye contact with my stomach and looked into my eyes, "When were you going to tell me?"

I looked down fiddling with my fingers, "I don't know... Everything that have been going on I didn't want to tell you. I didn't want you to worry. I didn't want you to sacrifice the crew for me and the child. You were already in homicidal mode, I didn't want to enhance it in any way or something. I know you. You would do anything for one person. I didn't want you to become overprotective over me either. Your avengerness was getting on my nerves so adding overprotectiveness to it and well I would of avoid you and ignored your orders to come to see you."

I felt James' chest vibrate. He's chuckling. His hand went up to the side of my face. He spoke, "I would of saved the crew and you with it no matter what. Is it...?"

I shook my head, "It's still alive. Healthy and what not. Give me the sickness occasionally. Nothing that I can't handle."

His hand hesitantly went over to my stomach. His eyes met mine as to ask if he can. I nodded. His hand gently went to my stomach. He rubbed the little bump. A smile broke onto his face, "It's a baby... our baby... How far along are you?"

My hand went ontop of his following his movements as he gently rub the bump, "Almost 3 months. And we won't be able to find out the sex till the 4th month."

James nuzzled his face into my neck. His whispers tickled my skin, "What are going to happen with us?"

What is he talking about? Is he leaving? Wait, I broke up with him during our mission to kill Khan. My chin rested ontop of his head since his head is tilted into the crook of my neck. I thought for a moment, "What happened between you and that Admiral's daughter?"

James stared down at both of our hands which were laced together ontop of the bump, "Who, Carol Marcus? She lead me into a shuttle and started to change infront of me. She was talking about taking the torpedoes onto a planetoid. I stared for a couple seconds. That's it. That's what happened between her and me."

I squeezed his hand, "Then how come she was telling a couple nurses that you two had sex?"

James shrugged sitting up looking towards me, "Every woman wants me."

He winked jokingly. I semi-punched his arm, "Egomaniac. Not every woman wants to be with you. They have to somehow get use to your personality."

He lightly push my shoulder, "Hey my personality is likable."

I snorted, "For some people. Are you sure that's all what happened between you two?"

James smiled a sly smile, "Is someone jealous~?"

I crossed my arms looking away, "No, that happened when we weren't together."

James rubbed his neck with the opposite hand from me, "Like I said she just changed infront of me. Nothing else happened. I love you Abs. Only you. I am sorry for the way I acted on board."

His hand cradled my cheek pushing it slightly to have me look at him. I looked down avoiding his gaze, "I'm sorry James. You know for not telling you. I should of. I just didn't want to burden you even more with the weight of saving the crew and what not already on your shoulders."

His hand pulled me forward and his lips met my own. His forehead rested on mine, "I understand. Abigail...will you marry me?"

My lips met his. I wrapped my arms around his neck whispering, "I love you James. I always have. And yes... yes I will."

James smiled big stealing another kiss from my lips. Johanna's voice filled the room, "Mommmmyyy! Daddy! I got cookies for all of us!"

The pitter patter of her feet sounded the room. She climbed up the bed holding out two cookies to us. One for each of us. I smiled taking a cookie. I glanced behind her seeing Bones munching on a cookie. He mumbled, "Better hurry before she decides to take them back. They're delicious."

I chuckled taking a bite into the cookie. This is going to be nice. Now question is, will I be able to handle the soon to be 5 year old child once the child be born AND a newborn AND an adult sized child... I will find out sooner or later. Bones informed us that the Enterprise is under construction so the rechristening of the ship would be almost a year from now.


	11. Chapter 11

I could of ended it right then and there in chapter 10 buuuuuuuut I want to continue it. so yeah. plus sorry if it was too fast with the proposal and stuff. I'll make it up to you guys. like make it you know amazing and stuff like that.

* * *

James was let home a couple days ago after his vitals seemed fine. Johanna ran into her room pulling out some toys into the living room after she turned the tele on to watch her cartoons. James plopped down onto the couch. He groaned stretching his limbs. I shrugged off my coat hanging it on the coat hanger. I gently plopped down next to James. James pulled on a few strands of hair gesturing to lay my head in his lap. He tugged on it some more when I didn't move. I swatted his hand, "I am fine James. Stoppp itt."

I continued to swat his preying hand while I turned my attention to Johanna, "Johanna please clean up after yourself when you're done with your toys. I don't want to step on anything."

Johanna looked upside down by pulling her head back, "Okay mommy."

James groaned snuggling closer to me, "I am bored."

I shook my head, "Be bored. I am not entertaining you."

James smirked twirling my hair around his finger, "I know something we can do."

Johanna luckily didn't hear him as she too involved with her cartoon. I glanced over to James, "Nope. I refuse to. Not when there is another being inside where you decide to plug yourself in. That is off limits."

James groaned louder snuggling into the crook of my neck, "But you can still do that at this time of the pregnancy. I know you know that too. So why are you being like this?"

I absentmindly ran my hand through his hair massaging his head lightly, "I just don't want to. How you feel if someone decide to poke towards your space?"

James shrugged, "But commmeee on."

I shook my head," Jo is here also so no. Find something else to entertain you."

James laid his head back letting out a sigh, "You're difficult."

I glanced at him in the corner of my eye, "I wouldn't be if you weren't such a horny jerk."

James laughed a bit, "You should know that I am like that, Abs. Plus what happen to celebratory sex after getting proposed to?"

I gave him a look, "That's only in your rule book. Not the general rule book."

James sighed, "Okay, okay."

James bent down so he was eye level to the bump. He stared at it, "Kid you are already creating problems."

I poked James' forehead, "Hey be nice. You created problems too when we were children like you know driving your father's car off that one cliff in Iowa. So don't even."

James' eyes looked up from the bump and into mine, "You joined in with me if I recall."

I snorted with a laugh, "Puh-lease. I was a victim. You let me sit in the car while you cleaned it since you wouldn't accept my help. Then you found those blasted keys and decided to go on a joy ride. That was an awesome classic car by the way."

James shook his head, "You were the one who was like..."

He changed his voice to a mocking high pitched version of mine, "Oh james, let's go for a ride in spite of your uncle."

I rolled my eyes giving him a light pinch to the arm, "Shut it. I did not say that. What you are doing is putting false words into my child self's mouth. Now go to bed and rest. I'll take care of things around here."

This time James rolled his eyes as he sat upstraight. He crossed his arms, "No way. You are pregnant and you'll get tired easily and have to take breaks often. I am fine, I can do things around here."

I gave him another light pinch which resulted him giving me a light pinch back, "You were _dead_ James. Dead. that is a bigger thing than being pregnant. Plus I am not handicapped. I am only what 3 months pregnant. I am perfectly fine. Just go to bed and rest. For me. For Johanna. For the _baby_. Please."

James grumbled as he stood up, "Fine."

I gave a small smile, "I am glad you see it my way."

James stopped walking towards our bedroom. He turned around slightly. Our eyes met each other. He pointed a finger at me, "If you were to sit down after a short amount of time, I am stepping in and _you_ will rest."

I held up my hands in a surrender fashion, "Alright okay."

I stood up tapping little Jo's back, "Hey missy. It's nap time. Go take a nap with daddy."

She whined, "Do I have tooo?"

I gave her a look, "Yes you do. Plus you are hurting daddy's feelings if you don't."

Johanna's eyes flickered towards James who looked at me then at Johanna. Johanna stood up running towards James. She clinged to his leg, "Let's go take a nap daddy!"

James smiled towards her, "Okay okay. Easy on the leg there Johanna."

Johanna unclinged herself and ran to our bedroom. I could her the springs of the bed speak in protest to her jump on the cushioned matress. I smiled at James, "Now you have to go rest."

James eyed me, "You win this round."

I gave off a laugh as he disappeared into the back of the pad. I went to the kitchen to pull out some foods to munch on while watching a wonderous 21st centry show that is surprisingly still streaming. I grabbed my goodies of fruits and chocolate and plopped down on the ocuch. I grabbed the remote changing the channel to where Supernatural would show on screen. A smile crept onto my face. It's all good in the hood now. James and Johanna went to nap well Johanna is forcing James to nap with her after I suggested it to her and well I am satisfying my cravings while watching Supernatural.


	12. Chapter 12

5 months.

Time sure went by. 4 months left. I already can't see my feet. I know my legs are growing that damn leg hair. I hate the feel of it. I don't trust James to shave my legs. I guess I have to somehow sit in the shower and try to shave them that way. Apparently we are having one child. My eyes met the bump. I stared at it. I highly doubt it's one kid in there unless I have one big kid who likes to eat all my food when I eat making me still hungry. It would be a dino-sized kid if it keeps eating ALL of my food. I already get hot and sweaty in the middle of the night. On top of that, I cannot seem to find a comfortable position which leads to waking James up. Sometimes he would try to comfort me but sometimes he would go to the couch to finish sleeping. That is if something at Starfleet wants him there. I don't mind it when he goes to the couch, that means I get the whole bed to myself. Oh yes. Swollen belly room. Bones suggested to James and I to register little Johanna into VPK. He sees the no harm in it considering she is of age and by the time she is done with VPK that the rechristening of the Enterprise would commence. James and I find it as a problem considering we are both in Starfleet. He's a captain and I'm his senior medical officer. Our position is on the starship Enterprise. I couldn't possibly bring Johanna and this unborn child in that type of environment but I also do not want to be left behind. James and I have talked about it briefly as one of us would be upset and leave the conversation at that. Johanna is with Wionna and George. The two are visiting for a couple weeks after hearing the news that I am in fact pregnant with James' child and Wionna wanted to see the child. I find it a waste of a trip but hey that's on her account. My eyes glanced at the clock of the cafe. James should be meeting me here soon. I took a sip of my tea continuing to read the what to expect book. I am not looking forward to the future months of pregnancy. So many disgusting symptoms as passing gas unexpectedly. The chime of the front door jingled. I didn't bother to look up as I took a bite of a delicious apple crumble muffin. I heard the chair in front of me scoot back. My eyes flickered towards the person.

James spoke, "I got out early."

He placed his grey uniform hat on the table next to some papers of mine. I placed my bookmark in the book to mark the spot. I gently rested the book ontop of the paperwork that I am purposely not doing. My hand shot up to my neck massaging the tender muscle, "We need to talk about this James."

James' eyes looked around then landed on me, "Another time alright Abs?"

I shook my head, "No. We need to discuss this now. Bones is right, Johanna is of age to start VPK. The baby will be here in 4 months. We need to devise a plan. I don't want to go at this blindly."

James let out a jagged sigh. His hand ruffled through his hair. His blues rested on my own, "Fine okay. We talk about it. Go."

I shifted in my seat to find a comfortable position. I spoke, "I gave this some thought of course. I find the starship isn't a suitable environment for a newborn and a 4-5 year old. I suggest that I will be grounded and get a hospital job or something of the sort. You will still be Enterprise's captain of course. You just will be one senior medical short."

I noticed James' jaw clenched. He shook his head, "No way Abigail. I don't want you here when I'm out there. I'll be missing the key points of our kid's life and see Johanna grow up. Most of all, I'll be missing you. You are not going to be grounded. That's out of the question."

Ah that's the reason. He doesn't want to miss out on anything. I bit my lip in thought. I ran a hand through my down hair," We can't keep Jo from her education James. Plus I wouldn't be at my post as I will be too busy taking care of our child so you will still be one senior medic down. Think about this rationally James."

He crossed his arms frowning. He knows I am right. His face suddenly changed as he smiled. I raised an eyebrow at the sudden mood change. He answered my mental question," We can hire a tutor for Johanna when she starts kindergarten since she will be done with VPK once the Enterprise shall be christened again. I will request another senior medic officer onboard considering your condition. She or he will take over your post till you see it fit for you to come back."

I noticed some women oogling James from the far right corner. My eyes flickered back to the man infront of me," James... It is still not a suitable place for children. Not since the Khan incident."

James gave a little groan. His hand rubbed his facial features. He leaned forward to the table, "Abs, what can I do to convince you? Apparently you have authority over what is going on even though I AM the captain and technically I am your superior so things should be going my way but knowing you...you are a stubborn mule."

I rolled my eyes. I noticed the women from that one corner that is behind James so he can't see them were whispering to each other while glancing at James. I eyed my muffin. I poked it with my finger. My eyes glanced up at James, "So what do you purpose for the safety of the two children if something does go down?"

James leaned back on his chair spreading his legs out. I shook my head, "See you don't even have an answer for that. Until you find that little answer of yours to secure the safety of your own child and Johanna from harm then they and I will be grounded till further notice."

James grazed his teeth over his bottom lip giving me a look. His head gave a slight shake to it, "You didn't even let me answer to your question Abigail. And you are getting paranoid. Is that a symptom or something?"

I was going to answer back till a woman from that group appeared to the side of our table. She looks to be excited over something. I leaned on my hand of the arm that is propped up on the table. James glanced at me then looked at her, "How may I help you?"

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed she smiled big but then shy her self away. She looked down fiddling with her fingers, "Uhmm... you're James Kirk am I right?"

James nodded slowly, not sure where this was going. He noticed that she didn't see him nod so he spoke in response, "That I am."

The woman glanced at her friends then at me then at James. Her fingers wouldn't stop fiddling with each other. I eyed the woman as she continued, "Uhmmm... I was wondering if you... were... uhm... to go with me... out to dinner sometime?"

She asked him out on a date. James was about to answer till I stood up grabbing my paperwork, muffin and book. James' eyes met mine in question. My eyes looked over the woman. She looks young. Younger than me, maybe a few years. I spoke, "I shall take my leave. I have many paperwork to catch up on."

I started my way out of the cafe. I don't want to witness something such as that. I trust James. I really do. I just don't trust the women. Especially the shy conniving little ones. They'll do anything to fool the fool. Luckily, James isn't a fool but sometimes he can be. The main reason of my departure is I can't handle other women going after him. I love him. My emotions are swirling in an abyss since last week. I just don't like it.

* * *

My feet are propped up on the table as they are slowly started to hurt and swell slightly. As I breathed in deeply, the front door opened. Johanna is home with me, so it's not her with Wionna. She is in fact napping. Thank god. Cranky child is not a good child. My eyes glanced at the door way seeing James just walking in. He slid his hat across the bar counter. I watched James as he shrugged off his grey uniform jacket hanging it up on the coat hanger. He turned around to look at me when he figured I was staring at him. He asked, "Why did you leave when that chick asked me on a date? You know I was going to refuse to which I did by the way."

I looked away staring at the bump. I gently rubbed my hands around the swollen belly, "I can't stand that. Other women that is who ask you on a date or some sort."

James walked over to the couch sitting next to me. His hand clasped around my hand rubbing it in circles gently with his thumb, "I would never do anything of the sort. I would refuse every woman who would ask me Abs. I love you. I love you and our child and Johanna. I wouldn't do anything to hurt any of you."

I let out a gasp. James moved into a position to focus on me more, "Wh-what's wrong? Something wrong with the baby?"

I let out a little chuckle, "No stupid. The baby just kicked."

I felt it again and moved his hand towards the kick, "See it kicked."

James' face start to etch a smile, "That's good. I'm glad. I'm glad our baby is healthy Abs."

A smile was brought onto my face as I leaned over to him. My lips met his briefly, "So am I."

James smiled a little bit more then dropped it as he went serious, "I seriously do love you Abigail. I wouldn't do anything to hurt you."

I felt him give a reassurance squeeze to my hand.


	13. Chapter 13

7 months... I'm a balloon. I cry at everything. I get mad at everything. I'm not sure what to do with myself except waddle. All I have been doing is waddling. Doctors say that my blood sugar is normal which is good. However, they still say I have one child in here. I highly doubt this belly is one child size. I'm the size of an elephant. When I bring it up to James and Bones, they say it's normal and that I am not an elephant. Tch, men. Even Johanna when she gets out of VPK noticed I am bigger, alot bigger than other pregnant women. Her damn teacher is pregnant so of course she would noticed.I have been going to the bathroom like every half hour. Damn kid keeps pushing on my bladder. Everything that is attached to me is in pain. Why did I get pregnant again? Oh yeah that's right this was an accident pregnancy when Jim got a little bit too excited and it actually punched a little hole into the condom. Or unless it was a bad condom. Eeh, I like to stick to the Jim story. Nyota have visited me often so I don't have to be around men all the time. I find that nice. I am having a baby girl so she calls it the girls day out with Johanna and us three. Three as in Nyota, me and this kid. James is going to get overprotective over the girl. I mean he already is with Johanna. He saw a little boy talking with her making Jo laugh and James walked up to the two staring the little boy down which lead to him running off. Johanna didn't speak to him again that day which lead to James bothering me which in all lead to irritation. I was close to punching the man. So close... James made sure that I don't do any strenuous work, I find that bullshit. I can't sit at home all day doing nothing. He even makes sure Nyota knows "the rules". What rules? Who ever came up with the rules should get punched. Oh by the way, have I mentioned I leak at night? Yeah I leak. I give out an ocean by the time I wake up. Not fun.

* * *

I sit on the doctor's table lightly kicked my feet back and forth at the end. My eyes wandered around the room. It's too bare. If this was my office, I would have painted it, put pictures up and some wall stencils. That would be awesome. I leaned to the side to look at my watch on my left hand. 1400. Great, not only the doctor is late but so is the father. I sighed heavily. I slowly started descending to lay my self down on the cushioned bed. I would have to anyways since the doctor want to make sure of something. I haven't felt any abnormalities. So I am not totally sure what or why the doctor is holding me hostage. I checked my watch again. Supernatural should be on. I am missing it. This should be the episode when Sam and Dean meet their father's father. I seen it a million times but I just love it. They get to see their father's father for the first time even though he does die later on. I find it a bummer. The door creaked open making my head jerk up. My eyes narrowed at the man. The man ran a hand through his brown sandyish hair, "Sorry Abs. Meeting."

James placed his grey hat on the chair that he would be sitting on. I groaned, "You're not the only one late. The doctor is too. You know you think seeing this is an emergency check up that he would you know show up on time..."

James' blue eyes studied my body and belly, "I just don't see what could be wrong with her. She was fine with the last check up. That was a couple weeks ago."

I gave him a no duh look. My hands went to my belly as I felt those false contractions, "If this is what a false contraction feels like then I don't want to feel a real one. When the time comes Jamie, you can have her coming out of you. Contractions and all."

James gave me a look, "What's barking up your tree?"

I tapped my chin with a finger as to be in thought, "Well let's see. I have been in pain since last month. This kid of ours is restless. The false contractions come here and there. I am leaking an ocean. You don't believe me nor does Bones believe me when I think there are more than one in here. And you are becoming overprotective with everything I do. I can't just sit at home doing nothing. I do have to do paperwork at the office. I do have to do guest speakings every once a while. I am a Star Fleet Senior Medical Officer, James. I am not just some no job mom who does nothing with her life. I was and still am an independent woman. I can handle myself. If something happens, of course you be the first to call. I don't even understand why you are so nervous and stuff when it comes down to this."

James looked at me then at the door giving a heavy sigh, "I'll tell you later."

I bit my lip hard. I moved my foot that was closest to him and give him a slight kick to the side, "Jerk ass."

James does look concerned. He shouldn't be. The door closed and James shook hands with the doctor. The doctor chuckled, "I see the baby is getting the most out of you Miss McCoy."

I glared at the man. James blocked my view talking with the doctor, "Hey doc, what is going on?"

The doctor looked at James then at me then back at him, "Here sit down will you?"

I maneuvered my arms to push me up. Something is wrong. Nothing can be wrong with her or them. They are kicking like crazy. Well speak of the devil. My hand went to where the kid kicked rubbing it slightly. Please be okay. James moved his hat placing it in his lap as he sat down. The doctor placed his glasses on his desk, "Well, we looked back on the tests and ultrasounds. Your baby seems to be fine. However, there was a hidden one. It's not doing that well. You Miss McCoy say you are a twin am I right?"

I gave him a slow nod. The doctor looked at the both of us, "Well the possibilities of a multiple birth from a multiple is likely. However not this likely."

He furrowed his eyebrows in thought, "You have in fact triplets. There is the strong one, the somewhat strong one and then the weak one. The strong ones are feeding off of your weak one's energy and resources. It's getting deprived. It is more likely that you will have a still born by the time it comes to giving birth."

I felt James' hand grip around my own. I gripped onto his hand tightly. This is definitely not good news. James seem to spoke up when I couldn't find my words, "Is it possible to have an early delivery?"

The doctor rubbed his tired eyes. He looked at James, "I am afraid if we do that then the weaker baby would not be able to make it through once it is out here."

I clenched my jaw. I didn't know tears have fallen till I felt wet marks on my jeans. I looked at the doctor, "You don't know that. You don't know how weak our child is. You don't know if our child would end up fighting or not. You don't know any of that. It's better to try to see now instead of having a still born when it comes to giving birth."

James looked over to me. His thumb is rubbing my hand gently. I moved my free hand to my face wiping the tears away. James looked at the doctor speaking up, "I believe both of us want to try having an early birth. For the sake of the last one and saving all three of them."

The doctor gave a nod and was about to speak. I held my hand up, "I know you are going to try talk us out of this. I decline your offer to wait till 9 months. I don't want our baby to die. 7-8 months is my time frame."

The doctor frowned, "You must know the second one is also in a weak condition. It's however stronger than the third but I cannot make a guarantee that the second baby would make it either."

James studied me. His eyes never leaving me as he spoke, "We will think about it. Is that all?"

The doctor answered, "Yes. You may leave."

James went to my side helping me off of the table. Tears continued to flow. The doctor left us alone. James helped me out to the car. I haven't spoken since we left the hospital. When we got home, James watched me waddle to our room. Our eyes met when I was closing the door. I heard him sigh and groan when I sat down on the bed. I heard a vase being broken. It made me burst into tears again.

* * *

James looked at the door that was now closed holding Abigail. They just found out some news that could effect both of them. He is fuming with the fact nothing can ever go right with him. Abigail was a lucky thing he is able to hold onto. It was even luckier when she told him she was pregnant with his child. Now this has to happen. James' hands have became in contact with a vase that held flowers he and Johanna picked out for Abigail. The vase dropped onto the floor, splattering the water and glass bits everywhere. James stopped and looked towards the closed door. She won't let him in. This is too big of a bomb of news. She have shut herself out from the world. They just found out they were having more than one baby to find out two might die. One if they give birth at 9 months and the other if they give birth earlier. It's a lose-lose situation. He fixed his hat and left the pad. He needs a breather. Too much in one sitting. James decided to go on a walk.

* * *

My eyes were drawn to the picture that was on a night stand. It is of me and James...when we were children. I could see the fading bruises on my skin where my father would beat me. I was wearing a little sundress. I had insisted my mother for me to wear it even though it would show my bruises. My fingers lightly touched the glass cased picture. I felt tears pool around my eyes. Mom, I wish you were here. You would give me insight on what to do. No matter what this is a lose-lose situation.


	14. Chapter 14

Okay fuck. Well I had this awesome plan and well my computer decided to exit my browser without me hitting my mouse. Apparently i think my computer hit my mouse which wasn't even near it but it's whatevers. I had an awesome thing going on too and it was long :C So anyways **I am sorry if it isn't towards the true way of the species but I am making stuff up along with the true stuff. Bare with me please.**

* * *

Today is the day that I am going to visit my father. I have to ask him something. I asked Matthew to come with me. James is at work. I have been holed up in my room since the day we found out. Today I figure I need to find out about this situation if mom went through this too. They haven't killed off my father yet. I am guessing they want him to suffer a bit in the pen. I don't mind that, actually. I stood infront of the mirror to take in my image. I am wearing a ankle length magenta dress. It shows I have a huge belly. I placed a hand ontop of it rubbing it gently. I mumbled to my self, "I wish I can have al lthree of you and be safe..."

I noticed something so I moved closer to the mirror. I felt my forehead and noticed there was a light but barely noticable ridge on it. A knock was on my bedroom door. I looked up from the mirror looking at the owner of that knock. Matthew smiled, "God lord, Abby. You totally have gotten bigger the last time I saw you. I am not saying you're fat. I think you're beautiful. It's just I think you're eating a little way too much for one baby."

We haven't told anyone yet. We didn't feel the need to. I felt tears start to pour out of my eyes. Matthew rushed over, "Oh god, I'm sorry Abigail. Forget I said anything."

He lead me to the bed to sit down as I started sobbing. I felt Matt start to get riled up, "Is it James isn't it? He hurt you didn't he?"

I shook my head, "It's not you... It's not him either."

I sniffled as I felt him relax slightly. He stared me down, "Then what is it?"

My hand went to my face wiping the tears away, "I'm not having one child... I'm having three. If we give birth full term then we lose one. If we give birth now then we lose two. I don't want to loose any. James doesn't want to lose any. He was going to tell me something on the day of the doctor's news but I holed myself in here and he went to get a breather and haven't spoken about it since then. I don't want to bring it up as well it would bring me into a state like this and James doesn't want to cause he doesn't want to see me like this."

Matthew stiffen. He spoke slowly, "So why are you seeing our dad if he is the one who killed mom and abused you as a child and on Enterprise?"

My red eyes met his bluegreens, "He might have answers. He was there when mom start to have us. He was there for the birth. I want answers."

I felt my hand instantly go to my forehead feeling the light ridge. Matthew's hand went to that hand. My eyes looked over to him. He sighed, "You noticed too huh?"

I studied him and noticed if I look closely that he has light ridges of his own. What are they? Matthew stood up groaning, "Well we better get this over with. No questions will get answered by sitting here. Does Jim know you're heading to see dad?"

I shook my head, "He is at the office of his filling paperwork mostly. He takes Johanna and drops her off to VPK then heads to work. James also gather up my paperwork and bring them home as he doesn't want me to be putting more stress on our children. Since that emergency appointment with the doctor, I haven't been talking much. He tries to get me to open but it wasn't working."

Matt frowned, "Then why are you talking to me?"

I placed my hands on my legs and use my weight as momentum to let me stand. I glanced back at Matthew as I grabbed my purse, "I feel today is the day that I do something about this. I'm not going to hole up anymore. I'm not going to keep silent anymore. I want to save my three children. I want them to be healthy and safe."

Matthew reached behind him into his back pocket. He threw his communicator at me. I caught it with a little difficulty. I raised an eyebrow. He pointed to it as he placed a hand on my lower back guiding me to the car, "You call him and tell him. For me. Please?"

My eyes looked down at the communicator. Alright. Okay I will.

* * *

James looked over to his communicator which seems to be beeping. He raised an eyebrow. Who must be calling him? He looked around his office and see Spock heavily into his work. So it's not him. It can't be any other of his crew members as they are busy with their own stuff. His hand reached over to the communicator and flipped it open, "Kirk."

_"James. Good I thought you died from the stack of paperwork."_

He stared at his communicator then started to panic slightly, "Are you okay Abigail? You're not going into labor are you? Is something wrong? Did something happen to the babies?"

While he was blabbering on with questions, James stood up grabbing his grey coat and hat and started heading to the door. He stopped when he heard her give a chuckle sigh.

_"Oh you worry wart. I'm fine. The babies are fine...I am with Matthew. We are going to see my father. I have questions that need to be answered. I'm tired of sitting around wallowing in my sorrows James... I want to save them... I want to keep them all."_

James slumped his butt on top of the corner of Spock's desk. Spock looked up seeing his captain in this state. James clutched the communicator, "Abs... I don't like this. I don't want you near that man. He harmed you ever since you and I can remember. He **harmed** you on my ship under my damn command Abigail!"

She sighed. He knows she is probably running a hand through her hair. She spoke, _"James, I know he did those things. Unfortunately I cannot ask my mother what have happened if anything have happened when she was pregnant with me and matthew. I need answers to my questions. I have Matthew with me so it's not like he can really do anything other than be handcuffed and watched like a hawk there."_

James glanced at Spock who stopped working. He gave him a little glare then turned back to the communicator, "Matthew I swear if anything comes to harm Abigail and/or my children I will personally kill you."

James could hear Abigail give a light chuckle as Matt spoke, _"Oh geez Captain Kirk. Threatening me? Tsk. I know not to get her hurt. Don't worry. If he does something I'll personally punch the man in the face."_

Abigail jumped in, _"I never heard you be so serious James... Don't worry my little worry wart. I'll be fine. I made sure the guards will have him guarded and of course handcuffed by the ankles to the chair's feet and wrists to each other. He can't reach me even if he tried. I'll let you in on what he says. We are at the prison now."_

James sighed, "Fine. But be careful. I'd like to see the one I love in one piece and not hurt when I get home."

Abigail spoke, _"Hey James?"_

James answered, "Yes Abs?"

Abigail smiled through the communicator, _"I love you and don't worry."_

James smiled slightly, "I love you too Abs."

The line went dead. James turned to Spock. He eyed the vulcan, "You were easedropping Mr. Spock. I never would think you would be the one to easedrop."

Spock raised his angular eyebrow, "Captain, you were and still are sitting on top of my desk. You looked to be ready to rush out of the office till she stopped you at your feet."

James shook his head slightly, "She always have something to say that makes me stop at my feet."

* * *

Matt helped me waddle myself into the prison. The guard guided us to a cell where it holds the prisoner, a guard, a table and a few chairs. I looked and see what looked to be a klingon sitting at the table. I stopped my tracks looking at the guard, "That isn't our father."

The guard looked over at the prisoner then at the paperwork, "That is indeed your father Miss McCoy."

Matthew spoke, "He's a klingon!"

The guard rubbed his neck, "The paperwork don't lie. He is indeed your father."

I looked back towards to our supposed father. His eyes met mine and he smiled wickedly. He's not a klingon. He's not my father. His voice met my ears, "Oh Abigail it is so nice to see you again."

I frowned as the guard left the room to guard the door. I scrunched up my nose as I felt Matthew guide me a bit closer to the table. Dad's eyes flickered to Matthew. He snorted, "I see you found your twin. You were supposed to stay with your aunt."

Matthew spoke up strongly, "I found Abigail when we both are in Starfleet."

Dad leaned back in his chair. His chains made a clink noise as it hit the chair and table. Matthew grabbed a chair and moved it towards me. He looked at me giving me this is an order i'm a captain look. James has that look. Dad's eyes then found my belly. His smile grew into a smirk, "It's that captain's isn't it? What was it... Kirk am I right?"

My eyes met his, "I have some questions to ask you. I need you to answer them."

Dad moved his hands open to show that he is free to answer. I fiddled with my thumbs biting my lip. I heard his chains jingle. He spoke, "Oh come on Abigail. You're doing that **thing** again. Haven't I told you to never do that? That whole fiddle thumbs and lip thing. It drives me crazy."

I glared at the man in front of me, "You haven't told me anything! You only beat me till there were marks left on my skin!"

I felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked up to Matthew who was glaring at our dad. I took a deep breath. I have to not stress my babies out in addition to myself. I felt myself look back towards my father, "Were there any complications towards mom's pregnancy with the two of us?"

Dad looked amused, "Oh yes there was but unfortunately you lived Abigail. You were supposed to die. You see good ole Matthew right there was eating up your life support. However when you both were born, you supposed to be a still born, you had some life in you. Your mother urged them to keep you living. The hospital did everything to keep you alive. Obviously you are living. I found out that you were living after I became banished from Qo'noS. Your mother and you two's existence are the reason for my banishment. I lost my honor and real family. I figured I could make your life hell along with your mother's. Your mother begged your aunt to take both of you. Your aunt couldn't take in both of you. Your aunt chose Matthew figuring he would be safe from my hands and I wouldn't harm women."

He slammed his hands against the table, "I lost everything because of you two! I raped your mother and she became pregnant."

I gulped clenching the arm rests with my hands, "So you...raped mother... and because you lost everything you made our lives hell! I am going through exactly what mother went through with pregnancy and there is possibly nothing I could do about it."

Dad smiled crossing his arms, "Yep."

Dad looked behind him to the guards, "I'm ready to go back now."

I didn't expect Matthew to walk over to our father and punch him in the face. The guards came rushing in as our father started thrashing slightly. Matthew helped me up and lead me out of the cell. He started rubbing light circles in my back, "Let's go home."

I waited till we got to the car to speak up, "Thank you..."

Matthew looked over his car, "Anything for you Abby."

I looked back over to him, "Can we see James please? I really need to see him and talk to him."

Matthew nodded and we both entered the car to head our way to James.


	15. Chapter 15

I rubbed my stomach gently as Matthew lead me towards James' office. My other hand rubbed my forehead as I felt small beads of sweat start to form. The pads of my fingers rubbed against the very light ridges of my forehead. I pulled my hand away quickly. Matthew caught it. His hand grasp that hand. He glanced at me, "It's going to be okay."

Yeah, that's the story of my life. I find out i'm half klingon and for some reason we both look more human than anything. Matthew opened the door for me and Spock raised his head to the sound of the door. I waddled myself in. I pointed to James' office. Spock gave a nod. I continued to waddle myself inside the office which the door was open. I could see James glancing at a photo every once a awhile while doing his work. I leaned against the door frame chuckling, "Well if you were this distracted then I shall take my leave."

James' head popped up. In a few moments he was by my side. His hand went to my stomach and he felt a kick and then another kick somewhere else that is impossible for one baby. It felt weak to me. He looked up meeting my eyes, "What did your father say?"

I moved into the office closing the door. I felt tears form around my eyes. James bent down slightly wiping the tears away with the pads of his thumbs. I felt anger radiate off him. I shook my head, "He didn't hurt me nor them. I...I-I'm not human James."

James froze. He studied me questioningly, "What...What do you mean?"

I wiped my tears away that happen to drip onto my chest. My eyes refused to look at him, "I'm...I'm... half klingon James..."

I heard James let out a breath, a heavy one in fact. He started to pace. My eyes followed the man before me. His hand started to rub his neck hard. He stopped looking away from me, "So does that mean... you and your twin and Johanna and our children have klingon in them."

I swallowed the thick lump that happen to make itself at home. I fiddled with my thumbs whispering, "Yes..."

He ran a hand through his hair roughly. He turned to look at me. James frowned, "Why didn't you tell me?"

I didn't speak. How could he ask me that? I just found out this very day. James' hands found their way to my forearms. I felt tears start to prick again. He slightly shook me which caused me to sob, "Why Abigail?"

The door burst open revealing Matthew and Spock. Matthew noticed James' arms gripping onto my forearms and me sobbing. Matt pulled James away from me. I felt his arms cradle around my shaking frame. Spock went to James' side and held onto his arm to hold him back. Matthew glared hard at James while he lead me out of there. Spock tore his eyes from me and looked over to his captain, "Jim."

James looked over to Spock running a hand through his hair. Spock spoke once again, "You hurt Abigail and looking over at the recent events, her water have broke."

James stared at the doorway. He feels anger, guilt and sadness run through his veins. He glanced over at Spock. His voice came out a whisper, "The doctor called. We already lost one."

* * *

Matthew noticed my dress was wet. He started rushing me to the car, "Abby... your dress... your water broke."

I glanced down through my blurred vision. I wiped my eyes to clear it and see that my dress was in fact wet. Great. This day just keeps getting better. Matt helped me get into the car and drove quickly but carefully to the hospital where Bones should be at. Everything happened so fast... I was in the car then the next I was being prepped to push. I have no choice in the matter as I was already dilated some freakishly how and the pains kept coming. It was to the point of being unbearable and I refused to push. Matthew was with me along the way as Bones was in the receiving end. I was sobbing and getting tired quickly. The little ones were pushed out and it was hard to keep my eyes open. Everything hurt. My bottom half and my heart. I had noticed Bones' face when he received the last one. It was filled with sadness. I knew right then and there something is wrong. I couldn't help but break down. Matthew went to talk with Bones. Bones glanced over to me a few times as I buried my face into my hands. Matthew disappeared to pick up Johanna who should be out of VPK now. Bones walked towards me. He pulled a chair up to my bed. He rubbed circles into my back, "I heard Abigail... I'm sorry. What do you want to do?"

I sniffled wiping my eyes with the sheet, "I don't want him near me or them. H-How is the second one?"

Bones looked down grabbing one of my hands. His thumb gently rubbed against my skin. His brown eyes met mine, "He is weak. I cannot tell you that he would die nor survive Abigail. He is though in NICU. We are doing everything we can to keep him stable and able to function on his own."

I couldn't cry anymore. My eyes are hurting from all of the sobbing I have done within the few hours. I hiccuped," Will I be able to see him? How is my baby girl?"

Bones smiled weakly, "You will be able to see him once we get him situated and she is doing fine. A good healthy 4 pounder."

My voice came out as a whisper, "She sounds so small..."

Bones moved my hair out of my face, "She is pretty small considering she is 1.5 months early. I'll have a nurse bring her in considering she is more stable."

I gave a weak nod. Bones stood up leaning down to give me a kiss ontop of my head. He disappeared to go where the nurse went with my baby girl. I leaned back yawning. My eyes kept drooping till they finally closed.

* * *

James made it to the hospital and he was already late. He caught a nurse, "Where is the nursery?"

The nurse replied, "You go down this hall and it will be on your right."

James pushed past her quickly. His feet soon stopped infront of a huge window that views all of the newborn babies. His eyes searched for his name. He frowned when he couldn't find his last name but found McCoy's. He sees a crying little pink bundle waving her little hands in the air. A smile slowly brought on to his face. He frowned when he only saw her. His feet started moving again till he found Bones talking with a nurse at a nurse's station. His hand reached out placing it on Bones' shoulder which made Bones stop talking. The nurse gave a nod and left. Bones glanced over at James. Bones frowned, "You sure are stupid. How could you harm her after all she been through? She was abused as a kid Jim, I'm sure you haven't forgot about that."

James breathed out some words, "Where is she?"

Bones crossed his arms placing a clipboard on the table, "She doesn't want you near her or the babies."

James froze, "How is the babies?"

Bones sighed, "The girl is perfectly fine however she does need to stay in the hospital for a while to make sure. The second born, he needs to stay here for a while. He is pretty weak. I cannot tell you if he will survive nor die. However-."

James interrupted him, "I know... The doctor called earlier while Abigail was visiting her dad. The third one didn't make it..."

Bones uncrossed his arms, "I want to punch you in the face for hurting her."

James looked up at one of his best friends. He asked quietly, "Did you know...?"

Bones raised an eyebrow, "Know what?"

James whispered, "She's half klingon."

Bones gave a nod, "I know since I was the one doing her physicals on the Enterprise. Why? Is that why you hurt her?"

James looked away. Bones frowned more, "By god man, are you blaming her heritage for the lost of your son?"

James piped up, "I had another son?"

Bones sighed loudly, "Yes you did. You **are** blaming her heritage. It isn't her fault that she is half klingon Jim. She didn't know, I could tell before hand. Don't blame her for the death of your son. You should of never laid your hands on her in the first place."

He clenched his fists. James didn't know what happened next as Bones literally landed one square in his jaw throwing James back slightly. James' hand went to his jaw rubbing it gingerly. Bones grabbed the clipboard, "That's for Abigail. I swear Jim if you don't clean up your act, I will personally make sure you will not see the four of them."

James watched his best friend walk down the hall knocking on a door before opening the door. James' eyes met a nurse's who happen to witness all of it. James huffed walking away. He couldn't help but stop at the nursery. His hand touched the cool glass. The pink bundle seems to still be crying. His fingers slowly lightly clench into a slight fist. His forehead touched his hand. He wants to do something. He wants to hold her. He want to help choose a name for her. The two of them were narrowed down to two names a few months back. One of his eyes opened and glanced towards the wailing baby. That baby is his. It's also hers. It's more human than klingon. However, it being klingon made the other two weak or dead. James needs time away. He already harmed Abigail, by accident as he was blinded by rage. James felt tears formulate around his eyes. He closed them tightly as he pushed himself off the glass. He glanced at his daughter one more time before he left. He will give Abigail some time by herself. James thought he could ask for a out of state mission. That is exactly what he will do. He doesn't want to push her away any more he already has.


	16. Chapter 16

James rubbed his jaw. Bones really packed a punch to his jaw. James feels the pain in his chest. His eyes looked on to the office of the higher command. There is a new successor to Starfleet. He finds her quite an emotionless bitch. His feet moved forward to the door. His knuckles rapped on the door. A faint _come in_ was to be heard. James opened the door and saw the blond sitting at the desk. He let out a deep breath walking to stand infront of her desk. Her green eyes looked up from the paperwork. She raised her eyebrows in question, "Kirk, what is it that you want?"

She placed her pen down with a little click. She crossed her arms. James held onto his hat tightly, "Ma'am... I'd like to go onto a mission. Out of state or somewhere. Just somewhere."

She studied him. Her chair swirled so the back of the chair is facing James. She opened a filing system and looked through the files. She pulled out two files. Her chair swirled back to normal. She placed the files onto her desk. James couldn't help but look at the names labeled onto them. James T. Kirk and Abigail K. McCoy. He looked straight ahead. He questioned her, "Ma'am if I may ask why do you have Lt. Commander McCoy's file out?"

The woman picked up the file of Abigail's and opened it. Her eyes skimmed through the pages. Her eyes looked up to see James' face, "It says here that she is expecting, am I right?"

James swallowed, "Yes she is."

The woman closed the file and placed it down. She leaned forward lacing her two hands together in front of her, "You are in a relationship with her aren't you?"

James glanced at her then looked forward again. He gave a nod, "Yes ma'am. Please can you give me an out of state or country mission?"

The woman in front of him studied the man. James glanced at her a couple times seeing she is staring straight at him. She leaned back, "Alright. I'll give you one."

What James didn't know was the woman wanted him away from Abigail. A smile was brought to her lips.

* * *

I woke up with a start. Matthew was sitting on one of those hospital chairs. Johanna was snuggled against him. They look cute together. My eyes scanned the room. The door opened revealing Bones and a nurse wheeling in a pink bundle. Bones smiled, "Hey there sleepy head. I got someone here for you."

I got into a more comfortable position. Bones scooped up the girl bundle gently and walked towards me. He gently placed her into my arms. A smile trickled onto my face. I felt tears lightly prick my eyes. My hand gently caressed her little cheek. I continued to stare at the sleeping little one, "Bones... She's beautiful."

Bones leaned down kissing my head, "Beautiful as her mother. What are you going to name her?"

I thought back on the names. I frowned, "James should be here."

Bones frowned crossing his arms, "He was here. I landed one in his jaw. After that, I don't know where he ran off to. He apparently stopped by the nursery seeing that little bundle. I told him about your son who is in NICU."

I looked down at the girl. My thumb caressed her forehead. It's faint but you can barely see it like you can barely see mine. Hell I didn't even noticed mine. The baby girl cooed in her sleep. A smile brought to my lips once again. I whispered, "Ella. Her name is Ella."

It was either that name or Amelia. A couple male names came to mind when we found out we were having triplets. We had 4 names picked out just in case they were a boy or girl. I looked up at Bones, "I like to name the two boys, Noah and Samuel. Noah is the one in NICU and Samuel is..."

I couldn't bring myself to say it. Bones rubbed my back gently, "It's alright."

He peered over Ella. His thumb gently caressed her peach fuzz, "Hey there Ella. I'm your papa."

A yawn was brought out of Ella. I gave a little chuckle, "She is sure a tired one. I hope she is like this all the time though."

Bones tapped my nose, "Only one can hope. I better go and do my rounds. I'll come back later to give you some supplies."

I gave a nod. Bones disappeared with the nurse. Ella snuggled in her pink blanket. I couldn't stop admiring her. She has both James and my feathers. His ears, my nose, his chin. I wonder what her eyes would be like. Every baby has deep blue eyes. She started to stir. Oh boy. The noise started to increase which woke up Matthew and a now curious Johanna. Johanna rushed to the bed trying to climb up. Matthew picked her off the bed, "Woah there, you're going to crush your little sister."

Johanna peered over to Ella in Matthew's arms. Matt smiled, "She is beautiful Abby. I'm sorry you had to breed with that jerk."

He frowned when he said that. I frowned when I heard that. I looked up at him sharply, "Shut it Matthew. I still love him. I am glad I had his children."

He held up his free hand in surrender, "Okay okay, no defense mode please."

I rocked the little one to quiet her. It's not working. I moved the sheet to reveal the milk machine and Ella gladly took it. I chuckled, "Piglet."

Johanna looked around, "Where's daddy?"

I looked up at Matthew and our eyes connected. I swallowed looking over to Johanna who was now fixated on Ella. I spoke softly, "Jo, daddy is having some time off. He will be back though, no worries."

I know James. I know if he done something he regrets, he'll run. He'll run as far can be to get himself straight. I know he left. I know he hates himself for hurting me. It was by accident, I know that. He was simply blinded by rage. Bones have told me that my doctor actually called him and told him one was already a still born. I understand now. He wanted to blame something, anything for the death of our son. So in all he blamed me...well my klingon side of me. I hate my klingon side also but unfortunately that is apart of me. Johanna glanced up at me. She seemed to accept that answer. My eyes flickered down to the suckling Ella. James still should be here. They are still his children. He has that right. Sure I said I don't want him near me but I was still in a state of shock of him harming me. I felt angry with myself. I felt hurt. A knock has brought everyone's attention to the door. The door opened revealing the new blond head huncho. What is she doing here? I raised an eyebrow in question. The blond nervously walked in, "You're probably wondering why I'm here?"

Matt and I gave a slow nod at the same time. The blond walked closer but kept her distance, "I'm the new head of Star Fleet, Karoline Newcomer. I want to inform you that Captain Kirk have recently taken a mission out of state."

I frowned. He totally did run. Far from here by the looks of it. I'll give you time James but once the limit is up, I will drag your ass back so you can stop wallowing in your regret. I noticed Matt clenched and unclenched his free fist. I cleared my throat making Matt look at me. He gave me the annoyed what look. I glared at him. Karoline hesitantly walked closer, "May I?"

I looked back towards her. I eyed her then gave a slow nod. Karoline smiled softly walking closer to me and Ella. She peered down at Ella. She spoke softly, "She is beautiful."

I thanked the woman. Karoline smiled. This woman seems nice...even though she granted James a run-away trip.

* * *

Noah is still in the hospital. Bones is his primary doctor. I only trust him with Noah since Noah is a special case. James still hasn't appeared again. One month already went by. I was able to bring Ella home a few days ago. Bones gave her the okay to go home since she was at a healthy weight and eating up all her nutrients and everything. She is acting like she isn't a preemie. Noah gained some weight slowly but it's progressing. Karoline have visited me everyday. I find that quite odd. The head of Starfleet paying attention to a Senior Medical Officer on some starship. Weird... Wionna came by once she got a wiff of the news of her grandchildren being born. Samuel's funeral was a couple days after their birth. I sobbed uncontrollably. James still didn't came by. Jerk. Asshole. Assbutt as Castiel would say from Supernatural. I chose a pearly white little casket. I had close casket ceremony. He was so small and his skin was translucent that I couldn't bare looking at him again without wanting to simply kill myself. Right now, Wionna has Ella as I came by the hospital to visit little Noah. He's a fighter. That's for sure. Karoline met me at the entrance of NICU. Weird again. Karoline gave a soft smile letting me go in first. I headed to Noah's incubator. I smiled sadly towards him, "Hey there my little fighter. Keep on fighting, Noah. Mommy's here. I'll always be here for you."

I felt a hand rubbing my back gently. I moved out of the hand's reach. I looked back towards Karoline, "What are you doing?"

Karoline frowned, "I was offering comfort."

I shook my head," You can offer me comfort without touching me, thank you very much."

Karoline took a step forward and I took a step back. I looked around noticing no nurses or doctors were around. As I was distracted with searching for any personal, she grabbed my hand pulling me towards her. I bumped into her frame. Her breasts nearly attacked me. I tried pulling away, "What are you doing Fleet Admiral?"

Karoline smiled, "Ever since I saw you when you were in academy...I knew I had to get my hands on you one day."

My eyes widened. Is she confessing to me? It sure seems like it. She didn't let go of my hand as she laced her fingers with mine. I scrunched up my nose, "Uhmm... are you confessing to me... in front of my son in NICU?"

Karoline leaned towards my face smirking, "Perhaps I am but I know for sure I am going to steal what is rightfully mine."

She granted James the mission so he can be away from me so she can get her hands on me as she has a lesibian crush on me. I squirmed under her grip, "I am sorry to tell you this buuuuut I don't play for that team. I am with James."

Her free hand went under my chin cupping it. She forcefully planted a kiss onto my lips. I scrunched up my nose again. This is weird and not for me. She pulled away letting go of me. She sighed as if she was in heaven. I fully support women who go for women and men who go for men but not if women go after me. I wiped my lips on my sleeve, "I may have to ask you to leave."

She smirked, "I'm head of Starfleet. Everyone here is under my command."

I frowned. Great just totally great.


	17. Chapter 17

I told Bones what have happened. He agreed with me to keep her away from Noah. I knew something was off. I also told Bones that I am going to search for James. I have a pretty good idea where to look. Iowa. Where else? He probably had choices and decided on that one. I have to take Ella with me though. Johanna is staying with Wionna who is still staying with me and the two to help out. I don't mind but I wish James was here instead of his mother. The shuttle landed in Riverside. Karoline might of sent him on a recruiting mission. There's nothing really out here except potential candidates. I was in civilian clothing with a buckled baby carrier that has Ella in front of me. I have the bib part standing up so it can hide her from view. I pulled my duffel strap over my shoulder and grabbed the baby car seat. I hailed a taxi and took me to my mother's home. James wouldn't be at home as his mother haven't seen him. The computer greeted me as I entered my home. I spoke, "Computer please call George Kirk."

The computer answered, "Yes Miss Williams, right away."

There were ringing dials till a sleepy voice answered, "Hello?"

I rolled my eyes, "George I know you seen James so where is he?"

I could hear shuffling and a bump on the ground. He groaned, "God Abigail so loud aren't you? I haven't seen him."

I snorted, "Yeah right. You're lying George."

He sighed, "Fine he is at my apartment in town. The address is 320 Truffle Street Apt# 30. He should still be there."

I smiled, "Thank you Georgie. I'll see you later. I need to pay that man a visit."

I hung up as I heard him mumble incoherent things. Ella cooed. I gently touched the top of her head. She is already getting the sandy locks of James'. She had hair when she was born but it's more out there. Just a little though here and there. I placed my duffel on the couch. I grabbed the baby car seat and headed to the garage. There should be a car here. I turned on the lights which reflected off of my tan grand cherokee jeep. I smiled as I headed to the back seat after unlocking it. I adjusted her seat and took her out of the carrier to place her in the car seat. She moved her arms around cooing. I chuckled, "Yes you get to see your daddy now."

She smiled her toothless grin. I bopped her nose, "Silly goose."

I buckled her in then closed the door. I went to the driver side and started my way to the direction James would be.

* * *

I placed Ella back in the carrier that is strapped to me. She seemed to have fallen asleep after a few minutes strapped in. I climbed the stairs to the third floor. I recalled my memory of the apt number being 30. I looked at the door hesitant to knock. I simply stared at it for a while. I couldn't bring myself to knock. I'm afraid to knock more like it. The door opened and it showed a startled James. Our eyes met. No one said anything for a while. His eyes looked down to the bundled carrier. His eyes softened. He moved out of the way letting me come in. I hesitated but walked in anyways. I looked around seeing some beer bottles littered around. I knew James drinks but it was occasionally. He rubbed his neck looking away from me, "What are you doing here Abigail?"

My eyes flickered back to him, "What do you mean what am I doing here? I want you to come home. Come home to your daughters. To your son."

His eyes instantly met mine. He hesitantly took a step closer speaking softly, "S-son?"

I gave a soft smile and light nod, "Yes James. Your son. He is still living. He is weak still but he is being a fighter...just like his father. He needs you James. Ella needs you. Jo needs you and I need you."

He ran a hand through his hair, "I can't come back Abs. I just can't."

I closed the gap between us. I could still feel the slow breaths of Ella. She is still asleep. My hand went to his cheek gently, "James... you can. That incident that happened in your office, that was a mistake. You were blinded by rage. You were giving the news of our other son who became a still born. We held his funeral a couple days after they were born. I chose to have it close casket. I couldn't bare it... I didn't want to see him like that again. He was thin and really small. His skin was almost see through, James. He wouldn't of lived even if he have gotten the treatments they are giving to Noah."

I heard him whisper Noah and Ella's names. I gave him an encouraging smile, "I know you were blinded by rage. You had to blame something and I was that something. I was the closest thing to blame considering I'm half klingon and half human. I understand, hell I still hate myself for being half klingon but I cannot change who I am. I cannot change what is already done. You have two beautiful children. You also have a wonderful beautiful daughter who still looks up to you. I know when you harmed me it was by accident. I don't want you to continue to..."

I looked around seeing more beer bottles that I haven't noticed at first, "blame yourself. I love you James. And I always have and always will. Will you please come back?"

James stayed silent. He moved slightly to peer over to look at Ella. I felt her shift in the carrier. I held onto her as I unbuckled her. I laid her ontop of my chest. She looked around cooing. James looked up at me, "Okay. Alright. I'll come back."

I smiled moving Ella so she can see her father more. She waved her fisted arm in the air as she made a loud noise. I chuckled, "She is excited to see her father. She wants you."

As I have said that, Ella got frustrated that she wasn't going into her father's arms. James held out his arms and I transferred the month old into his arms. He couldn't keep his eyes off of her. He whispered to her, "Hey Ella... I'm daddy. I'm sorry I wasn't there when you came out but I saw you...I saw you crying in your pink blanket of yours."

I smiled softly. I let those two have their time together. I started grabbing every single beer bottle around the house and place them in the trash can. By the time I was done James was sitting on the couch with Ella laying on his chest. He was drinking in every aspect of her. His daughter. I sat down next to him. Ifrowned, "What kind of mission did Newcomer send you on?"

His eyes glanced up at me for a second before returning to look at the staring Ella, "A recruiting mission. I finished a couple weeks ago."

I crossed my arms, "Why didn't you come back home?"

He sighed, "I felt guilty. I felt regret Abs. I have harmed you after I told you I wouldn't ever harm you. I loved you then and I still love you. It was eating me alive that I have done that to you especially when you were pregnant with our triplets. I had to stay away so I wouldn't bring any more harm to you or them."

I ran a hand through my hair, "You sure are stupid James."

James snorted, "That's what Bones told me when I left."

I shook my head, "I still wanted you with me. Sure I didn't want you with me after the birth but I was hurt and scared from earlier. Bones later told me what happened and I understood. I understood completely."

James looked up at me. He studied me, "Something else happened didn't it? You're just not telling me."

I groaned, "Don't. Just don't."

James shifted his body so he could look straight at me, "Tell me. I know that body language anywhere."

I rubbed my tense muscles in my neck, "Newcomer she well hit on me. She forcefully kissed me in the NICU with Noah present. She kept leaving me stupid little love notes. She kept on my heels since you left. She likes me as in like like me. I'm not into that for one and my heart already got stolen by someone and he is sitting next to me."

James looked like he was about to laugh. I flicked his forehead, "Don't laugh. It was hard to ban the head of starfleet from the NICU where she knows I'll be there to visit Noah every day. I made Bones to ban her by giving her some lame excuse to keep people out. I don't want her near our son."

James chuckled, "So I leave drinking to my sorrows as you were chased by our head of Starfleet who is in love with you and won't take no for an answer."

I smacked his arm lightly, "You should be protective or something. Not this."

James raised an eyebrow, "She's a woman. She doesn't have that one important part to do something to you."

I eyed him, "You don't watch porn do you? Every guy knows lesbians use a strap on and what not to get off with pleasure with the same sex. She can still rape me if she wanted to. She isn't really different than a man."

James frowned, "No. Nope. She better stay away from our son and you. I'll have a say on it if she does. You are mine and mine only."

I smiled leaning forward just before his lips, "I'm glad I'm yours and yours only."

I closed the gap giving a passionate soft kiss. I sighed in content against his lips as I felt his lips smirk. He still has his touch.


	18. Chapter 18

**So guys whatcha think about this story so far? Do you guys want me to continue on and do some actual missions from TOS? I don't know**

* * *

Bones ringed in.

The computer spoke, "Mister Kirk, you have a call coming in."

James groaned next to me. I stretched my legs and toes as I moved to look at Ella who was sleeping in the play pen we found at his mother's house. James groggily answered the call, "...yes?"

Bones sighed in annoyance, "Finally you answer. Did you just woke up?"

James rolled to his side to sit up rubbing his eyes, "You woke us up."

Bones spoke, "Abigail, you there?"

I let out a breath. Damn I was hoping to get more sleep. I let out a yawn, "Yes. I arrived the day before. Why are you calling?"

My senses went override as I thought only one thing that he could be calling for. I spoke urgently, "Bones, Is Noah alright?"

Bones spoke calmly, "He...He's alright. Slowly progressing. He had an episode of having trouble with breathing but he is fine now."

I held my breath as James and my eyes locked. I got out of bed quickly going through the drawers, "I'll... We'll be there soon."

I changed into James' clothing that he had brought over from our home. A pair of basketball shorts that end past my knee and a baggy shirt. I ran a hand through my hair as I heard Bones spoke again, "Abigail. He is fine."

I glared at the ceiling where I think the signal is coming from, "Bones, last time a nurse told me that was when he has more than one episode of trouble breathing. I want to be there for him. I'm his mother and I want to make sure he is alright with my eyes. I trust you Bones but I just got to see him for myself."

James watched me till Ella started to wake up cooing. Bones sighed, "Alright. I'll talk to the nurses who are assigned to Noah. I'll see you three soon."

James answered, "Yeah. See you soon Bones."

Bones hung up. James walked over to Ella picking her up. His hand cradled her head in the palm of his hand. He stared down at her smiling, "Good morning to you too Ella."

I looked through the drawers pulling out his clothes to wear. I threw them onto the bed, "We got to go James."

James looked up from a smiling Ella, "Calm down Abs. We will get there. I want you to calm down. He will be fine till we get there okay?"

I stopped running a hand through my hair as I held onto the carrier of Ella's, "I'm worried. I'm scared James. I want to be there for Noah. I want to see him for my self. I'm a mother and I need to protect my babies."

James chuckled, "You are pretty much turning me on with your protectiveness."

He gave a wink as he walked over to me handing me Ella, "I think someone is hungry. She is suckling air."

I held onto Ella. She is pursing her lips into a suckling stage. I chuckled sitting down on the bed, "Oh you piglet."

James changed into the clothing that was on the bed and he took the carrier that I dropped onto the floor when he handed me her. He fixed it on himself. Well tried to. He stopped looking at me feeding Ella giving a heavy sigh. I chuckled at the sight, "Having trouble?"

James gave me a look, "Oh shut it. It looked easier than actually doing it."

I looked at what he did wrong, "You buckle those together instead of those together. You can loosen it to your build."

He had them criss-crossed. James fixed the carrier and finally have it properly. I felt Ella stop suckling. I asked, "Can you get me a towel?"

James nodded disappearing in my view. He came back with a towel in his hand. The towel was held out by his hand. I grabbed onto it and placed it onto my shoulder. I maneuvered Ella to my shoulder. I started to lightly pat her back. I felt her head move around a little bit . She finally stopped and let out a big burp. James smiled, "Yep that's my daughter."

I rolled my eyes, "Of course you'll say that. Every man would say that."

James snorted, "Not every guy."

I shook my head, "Okay whatever you say."

* * *

We decided to leave the play pen at George's. We stopped by my house and picked up my duffel and there was already a shuttle there waiting for passengers when we got there. I kept getting worried as James drove to the hospital. James said he was gonna get Ella as he let me race up the floors to get to Noah. I stopped in front of NICU as Karoline was sitting on one of the chairs. She looked at her nails then up at me, "I was wondering where you went and was coming back."

My jaw clenched. She stood up taking a couple steps. Her heels echoing through the hall. I clenched my fists, "Stop! I want you to leave me alone! ...ma'am. I don't know what you got in your head but I'm not into and never will be into you. I'm into one person and one person only and that is James."

I heard Bones voice down the hall, "Like I told Abigail, he is fine."

Karoline continued to stare at me. She huffed. The heel noises started to get closer. I didn't loose eye contact even when I heard my name being called. I slapped her as she was about to touch me. I slapped her hard. Her head turned to the side. Out of the corner of her eyes, she glanced at me. I spoke hard, "I said leave me alone. I don't want you bothering me or my family. Please leave."

Karoline looked at me then turned her head to my right where I am guessing where James and Bones are. A slap noise went through the air. I gave a little wince. I turned my head looking at the now walking away Karoline and a red hand print faced James and Bones glaring at Karoline. I walked over to James. My hand hovered over his hurt cheek. I studied his eyes. My voice came out as a whisper, "I'm so sorry she did that to you."

James' free hand grasped my hovering hand. He brought my hand to his lips, "It's fine. Now let's go see our son."

Bones granted access for us to see Noah. I tugged James to the room and to Noah's station. I decorated it with boy stuff. A little car picture and a blue teddy bear in the far left corner to watch over him. My finger lightly went over his closed hand. I spoke softly, "Hey Noah... I brought your dad with me same with your older sister."

I glanced over to James. He was memorized by the sight of our son. My hand found his. I slowly took it so he can lightly touch Noah's little hand, "James this is your son, Noah."

James stared at Noah. His other hand gripped tightly on Ella's baby car seat carrier handle. Bones pried his hand off and placed Ella on a chair facing us. She is asleep. Good. James' face slowly started to smile softly, "Hey there Noah... I'm sorry I haven't been here for the past month but now I'm here. I'll always be here for you. Keep fighting, Noah. For daddy."

I smiled at James. He is finally accepting his children...and me... I like this.


End file.
